Bad Beat/Moaning/Venting - pray for Lazare

[iSnow]

Two stones of ugly fat can be lost in mere seconds

Just chop off your head

Hurtful..Fair, but hurtful.

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[Solskjaer]

TOOOLOONG Don't read etc

cuse grammar

An Eventful but ultimately amusing end to the evening.. This is long but still fresh in my head so read at your leisure.
So I parked the car just outside the city centre so I could get some walking exercise in. Anyhoo, on the walk back to the car I decided on a detour to get a few more metres in. I'm walk up an innocuous enough cobblestone street where I am met by a waiflike creature who pipes up with the standard . Got any Chaaaannnnnge. I quickly apologised, sorry only got 2 Euros on me and I intend to indulge in a Chickenmac burger.
2 EURO? That'll foooking do , hand it over. My instant thought was, 'how rude' I was nearly giving it to him but not now.
This is where things slightly escalated and I guess I'm partly to blame. I said, (like an uncle would to a nephew) I'll give you a kick up the arse ya cheeky fecker. (emptiest of threats normally)
He then turned around and pointed at his bedraggled arse. Gooo onnn then, Kick me up the arse. (Bishop Brennans face flashed into my head) I declined saying g'way from me. He then pushed his dirty arse right beside my leg ( I consider this ASSault)
I suddenly became aware of the two hairs in my nostrils and the sudden rounding of both nostrils (oh no the red mist descends) I promptly gave him a kickk up the arse. Deffo not a full blwn through the laces kick, or even a Fr Ted Priiest to Bishop hoof. It was about a 4 out of 10 powerewise.
Suddenly he went down like Steven Gerrard in the penalty box
screaming, HE FOOKING ATTACKED ME. ooooooop I thought
aware of people looking down the street and me in a hoodie. A
waif of similar stature appeared shouting at me WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM ? Get the Guards. I said, he asked me to kick him up the arse so I did. They were both threatening and roaring at me. Then I said, do ye want to settle this with cash lads (eg Out of court) I threw the 1st yob 1.50 and the ambulance chaser .50 cents told them to fooooook offf and walked briskly down the street to roaring accusations of being some kind of physco.
I eventually got back to the car and laughed for a bit then thought WTF AM I THINKING. Confirmed Physco . I might avoid that area next time.

[Mellor]

Calorie deficit of 500 cals per day will lost you 1lb per week roughly. So for 28lbs in 6 weeks you'd need a calorie deficit of more than 2k per day....Basically don't eat and run a marathon every day and you'll get there!

You are ignoring water. Even if normal weight loss was the goal, a large chuck would be water. But with a prop bet it's a larger % most likely.
He's need to lose 2 lbs of fat a week. Depending on current weight/condition that's not unrealistic.

[BennyHiFi]

Trailer for Tarantino's The Hateful Eight (and the editor in me is really glad they seem to have stuck with Eight and not 8)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_UI1GzaWv0

[Lazare]

Just saw my first xmas ad.

Actually, the whole ad break is xmas ads, ffs.

[iSnow]

TOOOLOONG Don't read etc

cuse grammar

An Eventful but ultimately amusing end to the evening.. This is long but still fresh in my head so read at your leisure.
So I parked the car just outside the city centre so I could get some walking exercise in. Anyhoo, on the walk back to the car I decided on a detour to get a few more metres in. I'm walk up an innocuous enough cobblestone street where I am met by a waiflike creature who pipes up with the standard . Got any Chaaaannnnnge. I quickly apologised, sorry only got 2 Euros on me and I intend to indulge in a Chickenmac burger.
2 EURO? That'll foooking do , hand it over. My instant thought was, 'how rude' I was nearly giving it to him but not now.
This is where things slightly escalated and I guess I'm partly to blame. I said, (like an uncle would to a nephew) I'll give you a kick up the arse ya cheeky fecker. (emptiest of threats normally)
He then turned around and pointed at his bedraggled arse. Gooo onnn then, Kick me up the arse. (Bishop Brennans face flashed into my head) I declined saying g'way from me. He then pushed his dirty arse right beside my leg ( I consider this ASSault)
I suddenly became aware of the two hairs in my nostrils and the sudden rounding of both nostrils (oh no the red mist descends) I promptly gave him a kickk up the arse. Deffo not a full blwn through the laces kick, or even a Fr Ted Priiest to Bishop hoof. It was about a 4 out of 10 powerewise.
Suddenly he went down like Steven Gerrard in the penalty box
screaming, HE FOOKING ATTACKED ME. ooooooop I thought
aware of people looking down the street and me in a hoodie. A
waif of similar stature appeared shouting at me WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM ? Get the Guards. I said, he asked me to kick him up the arse so I did. They were both threatening and roaring at me. Then I said, do ye want to settle this with cash lads (eg Out of court) I threw the 1st yob 1.50 and the ambulance chaser .50 cents told them to fooooook offf and walked briskly down the street to roaring accusations of being some kind of physco.
I eventually got back to the car and laughed for a bit then thought WTF AM I THINKING. Confirmed Physco . I might avoid that area next time.

Thank you for the inspiration man. Quite refreshing.

Anytime I'm tempted to indulge in some fast food I'm gonna beat up some tramps instead.
Wasn't this model previously championed by bumfights.com? Might there be some copyright issues? What are your thoughts on 'Stamp on a tramp' or 'kick the hole of a tramp on the dole' for provisional working names?

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[iSnow]

You are ignoring water. Even if normal weight loss was the goal, a large chuck would be water. But with a prop bet it's a larger % most likely.
He's need to lose 2 lbs of fat a week. Depending on current weight/condition that's not unrealistic.

I lost a stone in Malta in a 4 weeks in 2012, rocket, walking, water, cocaine. Awesomely motivated month

[Solskjaer]

Thank you for the inspiration man. Quite refreshing.

Anytime I'm tempted to indulge in some fast food I'm gonna beat up some tramps instead.
Wasn't this model previously championed by bumfights.com? Might there be some copyright issues? What are your thoughts on 'Stamp on a tramp' or 'kick the hole of a tramp on the dole' for provisional working names?

changing my name to CrillyWillie

[6starpool]

TOOOLOONG Don't read etc

cuse grammar

An Eventful but ultimately amusing end to the evening.. This is long but still fresh in my head so read at your leisure.
So I parked the car just outside the city centre so I could get some walking exercise in. Anyhoo, on the walk back to the car I decided on a detour to get a few more metres in. I'm walk up an innocuous enough cobblestone street where I am met by a waiflike creature who pipes up with the standard . Got any Chaaaannnnnge. I quickly apologised, sorry only got 2 Euros on me and I intend to indulge in a Chickenmac burger.
2 EURO? That'll foooking do , hand it over. My instant thought was, 'how rude' I was nearly giving it to him but not now.
This is where things slightly escalated and I guess I'm partly to blame. I said, (like an uncle would to a nephew) I'll give you a kick up the arse ya cheeky fecker. (emptiest of threats normally)
He then turned around and pointed at his bedraggled arse. Gooo onnn then, Kick me up the arse. (Bishop Brennans face flashed into my head) I declined saying g'way from me. He then pushed his dirty arse right beside my leg ( I consider this ASSault)
I suddenly became aware of the two hairs in my nostrils and the sudden rounding of both nostrils (oh no the red mist descends) I promptly gave him a kickk up the arse. Deffo not a full blwn through the laces kick, or even a Fr Ted Priiest to Bishop hoof. It was about a 4 out of 10 powerewise.
Suddenly he went down like Steven Gerrard in the penalty box
screaming, HE FOOKING ATTACKED ME. ooooooop I thought
aware of people looking down the street and me in a hoodie. A
waif of similar stature appeared shouting at me WHAT DID YOU DO TO HIM ? Get the Guards. I said, he asked me to kick him up the arse so I did. They were both threatening and roaring at me. Then I said, do ye want to settle this with cash lads (eg Out of court) I threw the 1st yob 1.50 and the ambulance chaser .50 cents told them to fooooook offf and walked briskly down the street to roaring accusations of being some kind of physco.
I eventually got back to the car and laughed for a bit then thought WTF AM I THINKING. Confirmed Physco . I might avoid that area next time.

Next time you get the chance to kick a junkie up the hole give it a full 10/10 effort.

[dobby]

Just saw my first xmas ad.

Actually, the whole ad break is xmas ads, ffs.

Next door have their decorations up. Depressing shite.

(Not the cat people, the crazy old lady)

[Guest]

One final blast of booze tonight and I'm of it until Xmas. Just seen pics from WebSummit and was ashamed to see the results of 6 months boozing & cheese eating. Is it possible to lose 2 stone before Xmas? Would anyone be interested in a prob bet. How did this happen?...

Id be interested in a prop bet.
Ideas welcome.

[Solskjaer]

Next time you get the chance to kick a junkie up the hole give it a full 10/10 effort.

dodgy cartlidge, best effort prob a 7.

[Guest]

There has to be more to this story,15 minute window and presumably whoever it was would have had to collect at the track bookies???

http://www.thejournal.ie/docket-woman-horse-racing-stolen-docket-2428550-Nov2015/

WOMAN IN Australia has had her winnings stolen after posting the docket from a horse race on Facebook.

This happened when a woman, known only as Chantelle from Perth, posted the winning selfie to the social media site with the docket’s barcode still visible.

Attending the Melbourne Cup, she had made the bet at the race track.

Returning to the same bookie she placed her bet at only a short time before, Chantelle was told someone had already taken the cash.

The woman, who reportedly never gambled before, placed $20 (€13) on a horse called Prince of Penzanceat at odds of 101-1 as part of the Melbourne Cup horse race.

Speaking to Australian station Triple M, the woman said that when her horse came in, she and her friends were “stoked, we were so happy”.

“We had already been up to the guy to do our bet and when we found out we had won I was pretty stoke naturally so I took a selfie to show my friends that we’d placed,” she said.

In the 15 minutes between taking the photograph and returning to the counter, Chantelle found that someone had stolen her winnings.

Somebody had pretty good game at filtering my picture and cutting out the bar code and putting it in an automated machine.
The individual who took the winnings is thought to be a Facebook friend of either herself or one of her two friends that she tagged in the photograph.

It would have to be someone we would like to think of as an acquaintance, but I might need a bit of a Facebook cull now.

[Guest]

Just flicked on Vinnie Brown Aodhain o Riordan thinks travellers should be a recognised ethnic minority?
What say yee.
Another excuse to get more benefits and get away with more shit.

[bohsman]

Monkey 47 gin on the way from Germany, going to order some of that Polish grass vodka next, anyone recommend a decent tequila next?

[Theresa]

G'wan Willie.

He asked for it. I'd have booted him into next week but you're a better man that I.

[Guest]

Monkey 47 gin on the way from Germany, going to order some of that Polish grass vodka next, anyone recommend a decent tequila next?

Cafe Patron for something a bit different!

Sipsmith slow gin and Sipsmith damson vodka are pretty dam good while I'm at it

[thechamp87]

One final blast of booze tonight and I'm of it until Xmas. Just seen pics from WebSummit and was ashamed to see the results of 6 months boozing & cheese eating. Is it possible to lose 2 stone before Xmas? Would anyone be interested in a prob bet. How did this happen?...

I think it could be done. It wouldn't be healthy or sustainable but you could definitely drop 2 stone in 7 weeks.

[Raoul Duke III]

wp Solks, raised my glass to you reading that

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[dobby]

Just flicked on Vinnie Brown Aodhain o Riordan thinks travellers should be a recognised ethnic minority?
What say yee.
Another excuse to get more benefits and get away with more shit.

Any excuse. They're the only ethnic minority to be driving round in jeeps and 152 reg mercs and BMW. Fuck em. If they want to be an ethnic minority fuck off to siberia

[Lazare]

Monkey 47 gin on the way from Germany, going to order some of that Polish grass vodka next, anyone recommend a decent tequila next?

Make sure you get Zubrowska Bison Grass, my Polish friend says there's plenty of grass vodkas but none of them match the taste of Zubrowska.

Have him shipping me in five bottles.

Oh, apple juice ainec.

[Raoul Duke III]

Was fairly certain they were an ethnic minority. Aren't they different to Celts in origin, who make up the majority of Ireland? Doesn't that them make them a literal ethnic minority? What I don't get is how we're allowed to debate whether they are an actual geneaological fact. How can you debate facts? Maybe I'm missing something on what ethnic means though. If we argue the case forcefully enough are we allowed to decide that black people are not black?

I think we should send 'Ass-Kickin' Willie' around to sort them out (and anyone else who gives us jip)

Kinda like this:

[Guest]

Was fairly certain they were an ethnic minority. Aren't they different to Celts in origin, who make up the majority of Ireland? Doesn't that them make them a literal ethnic minority? What I don't get is how we're allowed to debate whether they are an actual geneaological fact. How can you debate facts? Maybe I'm missing something on what ethnic means though. If we argue the case forcefully enough are we allowed to decide that black people are not black?

There irish like it or not.
Balck people are not black there african american irish whatever.
Many of us are different to celts in origin.
We had the vikings the normans the plantations english ulster scots some french Hugenots.

[Guest]

Just flicked on Vinnie Brown Aodhain o Riordan thinks travellers should be a recognised ethnic minority?
What say yee.
Another excuse to get more benefits and get away with more shit.

He didn't have enough conviction to show up for the vote to grant them ethnic status last night though. Feel sorry for all the activists though,would have been plenty of grants and cushty quango jobs to be milked if it had passed

[Raoul Duke III]

There irish like it or not.
Balck people are not black there african american irish whatever.
Many of us are different to celts in origin.
We had the vikings the normans the plantations english ulster scots some french Hugenots.

Spanish Armada didn't make it as far inland as Ballinasloe?

[Solskjaer]

cheers folks, still feel slightly guilty but the real story is how come I only have 2 euro on me and I was using it for food. This is the real tragedy in this little confession. Confirmed physco and busto in the one post.

Will kick junkies arses for money.

[Guest]

Was fairly certain they were an ethnic minority. Aren't they different to Celts in origin, who make up the majority of Ireland? Doesn't that them make them a literal ethnic minority? What I don't get is how we're allowed to debate whether they are an actual geneaological fact. How can you debate facts? Maybe I'm missing something on what ethnic means though. If we argue the case forcefully enough are we allowed to decide that black people are not black?

They are as Irish as anyone else

Tinker is just a traveling trades man, they are descended from traveling trades/sales men and the rest is just separation from the norm

[Raoul Duke III]

Will kick junkies arses for money.

€2 per ass, need photographic\video evidence before shippage

[Guest]

Spanish Armada didn't make it as far inland as Ballinasloe?

We had some yank long lost relatives of my great grand parents get in contact.
He was sure was some spanish blood on fathers side mayo side.
Lots of black hair on that side.
Mothers family were from the balck side of the church wicklow.

Think many were slaughtered as they hit the beaches is there any info on those who landed.
Obv the english were poxed with luck worst storm in a 100 years.
Imagine if the spanish had met .ie could have checked a few days in advance.

[Raoul Duke III]

We had some yank long lost relatives of my great grand parents get in contact.
He was sure was some spanish blood on fathers side mayo side.
Lots of black hair on that side.
Mothers family were from the balck side of the church wicklow.

Think many were slaughtered as they hit the beaches is there any info on those who landed.
Obv the english were poxed with luck worst storm in a 100 years.
Imagine if the spanish had met .ie could have checked a few days in advance.

Plenty of dark-eyed beauties in Galway to this very day

[Guest]

Spanish Armada didn't make it as far inland as Ballinasloe?

Them Spanish lads must have done some amount of ridin seeing as half the west coast look Basque

[Guest]

Plenty of dark-eyed beauties in Galway to this very day

Pics of your missus?

[Lazare]

My paternal lineage is French. A group that travelled from a town called Saint Aubain (Tobin) in the 1600s or thereabouts.

[Solskjaer]

tangent.
On the course I'm doing in town. About 60/40 Irish/foreign. The only person I have a problem understanding is some guy from Armagh. Notaspacenorabreathbetweenhiswords. (or gawniitneteeebouttttaboutttit as he would say)

[Raoul Duke III]

Pics of your missus?

natural blonde so guess they didn't make it to Glenamaddy either

probably stuck to the coast waiting for a life back home

[Guest]

SPOILER

Armada stuff is all bollix btw,it's reckoned that the reason for the Spanish looks is simply that the first (one of the first) groups on the not yet an Island were from northern Spain

[Raoul Duke III]

My paternal lineage is French. A group that travelled from a town called Saint Aubain (Tobin) in the 1600s or thereabouts.

the patron saint of guitar wankers

[Guest]

Them Spanish lads must have done some amount of ridin seeing as half the west coast look Basque

I think they done some study and found that this was an ancient migration.
Bear brown bear not some hairy gay was found in an irish cave.
The dna was closely related to Basque bears leading to the belief they were brought by early basques as food pets who knows.

[Guest]

natural blonde so guess they didn't make it to Glenamaddy either

probably stuck to the coast waiting for a life back home

Have bad memories of Glenamaddy usually getting hidings in underage gaa games.

[Guest]

I think they done some study and found that this was an ancient migration.
Bear brown bear not some hairy gay was found in an irish cave.
The dna was closely related to Basque bears leading to the belief they were brought by early basques as food pets who knows.

Yup; see the spoiler

[Lazare]

the patron saint of guitar wankers

There are many things I would like to say to you, but I don't know how.

[Guest]

There are many things I would like to say to you, but I don't know how.

Have you considered writing him a song?

[Lazare]

Maybe

[Lazare]

I said Maybe

[Raoul Duke III]

Maybe

Your music's shite it keeps me up all night

[Solskjaer]

€2 per ass, need photographic\video evidence before shippage

PM'd IBAN/BIC

[iSnow]

Monkey 47 gin on the way from Germany, going to order some of that Polish grass vodka next, anyone recommend a decent tequila next?

Patron, bon voyage!

[Raoul Duke III]

Have bad memories of Glenamaddy usually getting hidings in underage gaa games.

times have changed although the weemin won the county championship the other weekend

speaking of Glenamaddy and Travellers, the father-in-law used to relate the take with great relish the odd time:

http://www.wsm.ie/c/racist-attack-irish-travellers-glenamaddy-1993

posted without comment

[Solskjaer]

To balance things out I'm afraid I'm going to have to paint a likeness of one of the horsehead elites guys on my skirting board and invite him round to see the holy apparition of himself.

( dem boys are so conceited they'll believe it)

[hotspur]

If travellers aren't an ethnic group then who the hell are "travellers"? It's not a Meetup group.

[Mellor]

Just flicked on Vinnie Brown Aodhain o Riordan thinks travellers should be a recognised ethnic minority?
What say yee.
Another excuse to get more benefits and get away with more shit.

I was under the impression they already were. Somebody brought up some legal recognition on boards in relation to claiming a certain benefit. I'll try to find the thread.

Was fairly certain they were an ethnic minority. Aren't they different to Celts in origin, who make up the majority of Ireland?

I think their origins are a bit vague due to lack of written history. They split from the a main population .But I doubt it was pre-celtic. I'd anything I'd say they are more celtic than the rest of the country.

I think you be surprised how prevalent non-celtic origins were in Irish people today. Test everyone I say

[eamonhonda]

The cancelled the strike right before it was about to start, a long time after people had made other travel arrangements for the morning, would they not just pretend the strike was starting at 9pm last night get it sorted then and let everyone get an early night.

[Raoul Duke III]

The cancelled the strike right before it was about to start, a long time after people had made other travel arrangements for the morning, would they not just pretend the strike was starting at 9pm last night get it sorted then and let everyone get an early night.

Driverless trains.

We have the technology.

[6starpool]

Driverless trains.

We have the technology.

I'd have stepped in to cover a route if they asked, I'm sure LSB would have as well. As it happens I'm on a half full train now, and got a seat for a change, so worked out well for me.

[Raoul Duke III]

I'd have stepped in to cover a route if they asked, I'm sure LSB would have as well. As it happens I'm on a half full train now, and got a seat for a change, so worked out well for me.

I'm twerking from home so looks like everyone's a winner

[Iago]

I'm twerking from home so looks like everyone's a winner

Artists Rendition of said event (may be very Slightly NSFW...unless you're twerking at home of course )

SPOILER

[Solskjaer]

I'm twerking from home so looks like everyone's a winner

Wtf is up with people. It's gotten to the stage where a man can't go for a walk these days.