Bad beat/Moan/Venting Thread - BBV Archive 1

[Zuroph]

jsut back from the munster match, epic stuff! I've never seen the weather so bad, perfect conditions for Munster, like playing halfway up the cliffs of Moher!

[SatNav]

Oh now be fair!
Just look at the new BBV thread title for God's sake.

What more do ye want?

LOL!!!!

[Laois Hammer]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O04ZUSDm9g0[/ame]

[Zuroph]

ugh, so GF seems mad at me when I come home from match. she's now gone to a friends for the night, and I'm left guessing what I've gotten caught for.

[Emmet]

ugh, so GF seems mad at me when I come home from match. she's now gone to a friends for the night, and I'm left guessing what I've gotten caught for.

ask in the wimmin's thread?

[White Knight]

ugh, so GF seems mad at me when I come home from match. she's now gone to a friends for the night, and I'm left guessing what I've gotten caught for.

anniversary/birthday/lack of alcohol?

[ghostface]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnoI7Be4VZk[/ame]

[SatNav]

ugh, so GF seems mad at me when I come home from match. she's now gone to a friends for the night, and I'm left guessing what I've gotten caught for.

honest answer!!!! " she is mad" Its called how would u feel if i fucked off and left u on your own when i need your company!!!!!

[Guest]

lol,what woman waits half an hour? screw that,if theres a que im off to the mens toilets! apologise as ya enter and once again when leaving and its dandy

In my wild an reckless youth when at a gig where I knew the lay of the land and there was a mad queue for the mens, Id pop into the womens

anyone said anything Id point out that if women are allowed into the mens, men are allowed into the womens

Usually some chick in there would pipe up in my defense and away I would go

[Electra Blue]

ask in the wimmin's thread?

Erm... did you leave the toilet seat up? Fill up the bowl and forget to flush? Missed the bowl and didn't clean up?

Just text her and ask her FFS! Have it out with her when she gets in... ask her if she's "pretending" to be cross with you so that she can pop out and have a sneaky glass of wine and hours of gossip with her mates without you texting her to get home.

[Zuroph]

honest answer!!!! " she is mad" Its called how would u feel if i fucked off and left u on your own when i need your company!!!!!

bitches be crazy.

Erm... did you leave the toilet seat up? Fill up the bowl and forget to flush? Missed the bowl and didn't clean up?

Just text her and ask her FFS! Have it out with her when she gets in... ask her if she's "pretending" to be cross with you so that she can pop out and have a sneaky glass of wine and hours of gossip with her mates without you texting her to get home.

You're probably closer to right I'd say.
hmmm. no repkly yet anyway. Christ ye're hard work.

[NewApproach]

Tonight is a new low for the once-mighty BBV

[Strewelpeter]

Fckn poxy iPoker must die.

4.5 hours into 7K gteed 16 left andd playing 11 bb's AK on the button and a raise in before me and the poxy client disconnects.
get back and I'm crippled shove A9 get called by 28o A28 flop
FML

[White Knight]

I am not usually one for "hands" but flopping 3 aces with A10 from a hero call vs 66 is very satisfying

[SatNav]

Tonight is a new low for the once-mighty BBV

feck off ye love it!!!!

[NewApproach]

feck off ye love it!!!!

Oh yeah, fake shitting and urinals are really inspiring topics!

[Zuroph]

Tonight is a new low for the once-mighty BBV

every time we hit rock bottom, we discover a new more powerful drill. Keep diggin lads.

[rounders123]

Some world class toilet ettiquette was adhered to today im glad to report. The newly 'done up' mens jacks/changing room somehow doesnt have a urinal just three cubicles. Ridiculous.

I walk in and one cubicle is occupied. I walk into a vacant one for a slash and i must have confused him when he heard me tear a jacks roll (so i can lift the seat without having to touch it. Im not a piddler with the seat down as i have spitter spatter consideration.)

With that the flush hurridly goes next door to signal he wants no hand wash clash in case id be a quick user. For a second he doesnt know that im not locking up and soon realises im only having a slash so theres an obvious slow down next door. He must have realised he betrayed himself with the flush and no exit so i hurried up to save his behind locked door blushes. So he diligently waited until i was finished and hand washed. He didnt even give me the hurry up on my last couple of strides out the door by letting me hear the door latch open. Probably because as i mentioned i hurried right up as one courtesy deserves another.

[SatNav]

Oh yeah, fake shitting and urinals are really inspiring topics!

oh so you were not referring to us lovely ladies taking over here! phew thank fuck!

yes i have to agree the topic here tonight was fairly shitty

[dannydiamond]

This is what happens when we let the women out of the kitcken/bedroom.

See what damage they're capable of in a couple of hours.

[Laois Hammer]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpuVaCA8_gg[/ame]


premo >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

SPOILER

[SatNav]

This is what happens when we let the women out of the kitcken/bedroom.

See what damage they're capable of in a couple of hours.

secret its called multitasking!

[SatNav]

This is what happens when we let the women out of the kitcken/bedroom.

See what damage they're capable of in a couple of hours.

its bad enough ye dont know where it is, but ye also cant spell it!!!!!

[Electra Blue]

Some world class toilet ettiquette was adhered to today im glad to report. The newly 'done up' mens jacks/changing room somehow doesnt have a urinal just three cubicles. Ridiculous.

I walk in and one cubicle is occupied. I walk into a vacant one for a slash and i must have confused him when he heard me tear a jacks roll (so i can lift the seat without having to touch it. Im not a piddler with the seat down as i have spitter spatter consideration.)

With that the flush hurridly goes next door to signal he wants no hand wash clash in case id be a quick user. For a second he doesnt know that im not locking up and soon realises im only having a slash so theres an obvious slow down next door. He must have realised he betrayed himself with the flush and no exit so i hurried up to save his behind locked door blushes. So he diligently waited until i was finished and hand washed. He didnt even give me the hurry up on my last couple of strides out the door by letting me hear the door latch open. Probably because as i mentioned i hurried right up as one courtesy deserves another.

I'm impressed Aidan... your mother clearly raised you well! I bet you wouldn't hesitate to use the other urinal either if the middle one was occupied?!

Who wants to bet that it was our Daire in the other cubicle(!)

[kakak1]

26 Ways To Make A Woman Smile

1. When she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. Girls love that.

2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. If she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.

3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is say "you better be". Repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.

5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement. And every girl needs some improvement.

6. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them.

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "f*** you" and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.

8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then, drive her home. When she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper gently into her ear "...because i
can."

9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames.

10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.

11. Warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear.

12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the partys dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things like basketball.

15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

16. If you actually care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy.

18. Take her out to dinner. Right when shes about to order interrupt and say no she's not hungry. Make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for them.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy.

20. Give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. But not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what i'm talking about.

21. When its raining keep asking her if shes crying. She'll say no it's just the rain. Ten minutes later turn to her and just scream at her to stop crying you f***ing baby. Girls like a tough man.

22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

23. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This way she'll think you're mysterious.

24. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then, next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but i think it's funny.

26. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call youre going to tell her a special surprise. Now shell be really excited. Now dont call.

[hotspur]

Let's put all this misogyny behind us with a nice going to bed lullaby with those splendid minstrels NWA:

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=To5bUpOEHcw&feature=related[/ame]

[gorrrr72]

Toilet etiquette questions:

1) 3 urinals in the jacks in work. If I walk into the jacks needing a piss and there's someone standing at the middle one is it acceptable for me to piss in the one on the left or the right or should I sheepishly go to a bog and pretending I'm taking a dump?

2) Is yer man acting the bollox by pissing in the middle one? I'd usually take one on either side if there were 3 free out of consideration to my co-workers.

I meekly ducked into the bog fwiw. He took a ridic long time washing his hands too so I had to pretend to wipe my arse and along with the obligatory flush

Next time just stand behind him until he's finished and when he asks WTF? Just say you like to use the middle one too.

[gorrrr72]

I 100% agree with this. Never in a million years would i want to pretend i'm taking a dump. It's nightmare as it is when you need to take a dump in the ifrst place



No matter whether it's work/pub/club or whatever, if i'm needing a leak and there's a cubicle free, i use it and leave the urinal alone. I actually just leave the door open when i'm taking a piss. I don't see any reason why you think you need to stand beside someone at a urinal if it's free

+1
At the risk of sounding a bit ghey am I the only man who dabs after a shake?

[shano_88]

Twice within 10 minutes hurt!

Full Tilt No-Limit Hold'em, $0.25 BB (6 handed) - Full-Tilt Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com

Button ($32.85)
SB ($15.89)
BB ($25)
UTG ($25)
Hero (MP) ($36.56)
CO ($25)

Preflop: Hero is MP with A, K
UTG bets $1, Hero calls $1, 4 folds

Flop: ($2.35) 7, 7, 3 (2 players)
UTG bets $1.50, Hero raises to $5, UTG calls $3.50

Turn: ($12.35) K (2 players)
UTG checks, Hero bets $6.75, UTG calls $6.75

River: ($25.85) 6 (2 players)
UTG checks, Hero bets $23.81 (All-In), UTG calls $12.25 (All-In)

Total pot: $50.35 | Rake: $2.51

Results:
UTG had A, A (two pair, Aces and sevens).
Hero had A, K (two pair, Kings and sevens).
Outcome: UTG won $47.84




Full Tilt No-Limit Hold'em, $0.25 BB (6 handed) - Full-Tilt Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com

MP ($21.01)
Hero (CO) ($35.95)
Button ($25)
SB ($30.26)
BB ($8.35)
UTG ($25)

Preflop: Hero is CO with K, A
2 folds, Hero bets $0.75, Button raises to $2.50, 2 folds, Hero raises to $5.75, Button calls $3.25

Flop: ($11.85) 5, 8, 5 (2 players)
Hero checks, Button checks

Turn: ($11.85) K (2 players)
Hero bets $5.25, Button raises to $19.25 (All-In), Hero calls $14

River: ($50.35) 10 (2 players, 1 all-in)

Total pot: $50.35 | Rake: $2.51

Results:
Button had A, A (two pair, Aces and fives).
Hero had K, A (two pair, Kings and fives).
Outcome: Button won $47.84

[White Knight]

We have 5 cubicles in work, I have them assorted in preferential order.

1, 5, 4, 3, 2 from the door. I think its important to be prepared heading in ...

[chips1234]

WOW!! is all i have to say

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/basketball/blog/the_dagger/post/Prepare-to-be-impressed-by-this-woman-s-pop-a-sh?urn=ncaab-286150

[JackBurton]

WOW!! is all i have to say

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/basketb...n=ncaab-286150

Wow, he really does look like a girl!

[Angry-Ball]

some ball of shit talk going on here tonight


where is chd?
he wouldn't be long sorting this out

[Angry-Ball]

ok iam going to sort this out

[tipp86]

Seriously tilting night played 3.2k hands but was really swingy and could never get into profit even tho i ended up only down 1 buyin my head is fried. I was even abusing like mad in the chat which i hate doing.

[Zuroph]

oh FML. I'm being accused of cheating with a girl, and I havent been. she got into my facebook by accident, and saw a few pisstake messages from this girl about magic, and how she'd settled down with some guy, and thinks there was something going on cos there was an "x" at the end of a few messages. crap crap crap

[Angry-Ball]

ok due to the recent influx of wimmins i suggest that we all fuck off and leave them here on their own.

SPOILER

i have found a new home for us here

[Angry-Ball]

oh FML. I'm being accused of cheating with a girl, and I havent been. she got into my facebook by accident, and saw a few pisstake messages from this girl about magic, and how she'd settled down with some guy and thinks there was something going on cos there was an "x" at the end of a few messages. crap crap crap

mehh
standard enough, i get a couple of these outbursts every few months
learning to deal with it is the tricky part
do nothing to put her mind at ease is my advice
if an oppurtunity pops up to wind her up even more during the future argument you should take it

if your serious about this girl you have to get used to these reckless outbursts, its a woman thing if they go any few weeks without an arguement they will invent one

[CHDad]

Morning Eight-Ball

[gorrrr72]

oh FML. I'm being accused of cheating with a girl, and I havent been. she got into my facebook by accident, and saw a few pisstake messages from this girl about magic, and how she'd settled down with some guy, and thinks there was something going on cos there was an "x" at the end of a few messages. crap crap crap

Calm down man.
Both of you sit down and read every one of your facebook messages incoming and outgoing and discuss/analyze exactly what each and every sentence means in your relationship with her.

Don't forget to go through hers too....

gtfo imo...accidently reading your facebook messages = bunny boiler.

[Aya14]

Calm down man.
Both of you sit down and read every one of your facebook messages incoming and outgoing and discuss/analyze exactly what each and every sentence means in your relationship with her.

Don't forget to go through hers too....

gtfo imo...accidently reading your facebook messages = bunny boiler.

This or just hit her with a steel chair!

[ghostface]

oh FML. I'm being accused of cheating with a girl, and I havent been. she got into my facebook by accident, and saw a few pisstake messages from this girl about magic, and how she'd settled down with some guy, and thinks there was something going on cos there was an "x" at the end of a few messages. crap crap crap

I'd be more pissed off with her reading my facebook messages to be honest. Got into your facebook by accident...... hmmmmm

Women be crazy

[tylerdurden94]

Fucking hell the BBV turned into a disaster for awhile wait till Raoul reads this might put him off the doom and gloom for awhile, maybe it would be better to read that than the last few pages!

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxsfEio0L8Y[/ame]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD8AFbD2mmE[/ame]

[tylerdurden94]

oh FML. I'm being accused of cheating with a girl, and I havent been. she got into my facebook by accident, and saw a few pisstake messages from this girl about magic, and how she'd settled down with some guy, and thinks there was something going on cos there was an "x" at the end of a few messages. crap crap crap

Seems a bit suspect, yeah you got into it by accident? Ok log out so dont spend the next half hour reading my messages!

Refer to my videos posted above

[ghostface]

Fucking hell the BBV turned into a disaster for awhile wait till Raoul reads this might put him off the doom and gloom for awhile, maybe it would be better to read that than the last few pages!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxsfEio0L8Y

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GD8AFbD2mmE

Reach up in the sky for the HO-zone layer!! forgot how class that song was. I'll have to dig that album out now, the last decent thing he did. It'd prob be overkill to post Pussy Poppin' now

[Sledgejammer]

My house just got hit with a power cut...My phone is now my only source of light, internet, music and general entertainment. Isn't technology just awesome

EDIT it also says alot about my awful sleeping habbits that even sitting in a house without so much as a working light and it being nearly 3am going to bed hasn't really crossed my mind

[tylerdurden94]

Reach up in the sky for the HO-zone layer!! forgot how class that song was. I'll have to dig that album out now, the last decent thing he did. It'd prob be overkill to post Pussy Poppin' now

He is defo one of my favourite rappers, would love all of the songs on his albums but he has had some savage songs!

Never overkill

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF_-DST-6oA[/ame]

[tylerdurden94]

My house just got hit with a power cut...My phone is now my only source of light, internet, music and general entertainment. Isn't technology just awesome

EDIT it also says alot about my awful sleeping habbits that even sitting in a house without so much as a working light and it being nearly 3am going to bed hasn't really crossed my mind

High 5

Thank god my laptop battery is like 6 hours!

[Laois Hammer]

It'd prob be overkill to post Pussy Poppin' now

this is the overkill :
[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6w7rxKZxYjI[/ame]

[Sledgejammer]

High 5

Thank god my laptop battery is like 6 hours!

I also just realised my nintendo ds is right beside me. This powercut has barely altered my night at all. Insomnia and technology laughs in it's face!

[tylerdurden94]

Ivey Ivey Ivey

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2D5i6ReLb1E[/ame]

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m3cE39vIvOw[/ame]

[Zosma]

A friend of mine always picks the urinal next to you and tries to have a proper conversation. He loves it when people cant pee because of him.

[Lord Sir Banter]

All this uncertainty, EU trying to get Ireland to take bail out, Ireland not wanting bail out, is this the EU's way of trying
to deflate the eur?

kind of a subtle one this:

type 'recursion' into google...

Try anagram.


Just stumbled upon some tv show called 'Extreme fishing with Robson Green', sounds like an Alan Partridge idea.

[max_power]

Fucking no Simpsons on TV today due to a 30 minute special on the Royal Wedding.

[Lord Sir Banter]

Australians love that shit, bludgers.

[CHDad]

Australians love that shit, bludgers.

Seriously?

[max_power]

Yeah well it seems most of the auld ones do anyway. They interviewed a few younger people on the streets about it today and most of the responses were "Who?" and "Doesn't bother me, why should I care?".

[davepoke/her]

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