jbravado in the well

[Closed_Account]

Enjoying this one dude! Here are my questions:

First place you will go besides home when you and the Swasian get back?

Your mothers place. That, or the 40 foot.

Do you use/Did you use Tinder? Any good stories of loopy birds?

I did, I don't at the moment. It began to depress me. The neediness of it. Women surrendering that god given right to be have you curious. The pursuit. Like with Tinder you know it is game ball. Sometimes when I think about Tinder I genuinely feel like crying

I met this German girl last time I was over in Berlin. Date went fine and we ended up back in hers. She had one of those weird ceiling beds, huge fuck off ladder up to it. Anyway wake up in the middle of the night and need to go for a piss. Fairly boozed and as I cant see the ladder and shit decide Ill just jump off the bed. Jump anywho and basically land on my face, luckily got one hand underneath me or my beautiful face would be a thing of the past. Got to the bathroom before I passed out, where she found me bollock naked covered in blood and bruised a few hours later.



Do you eat the street food in China? Assume you'd starve otherwise. Whats your fave dish?

I cant eat street food as I insta convince myself I have food poisoning and there is a good chance I could somehow die. Millions of restaurants here, western and Chinese. I have eaten out every day for the last year. China, fuck yes.

Best IPB footyplayer?

Great question. I think it is hard to look past DIT Jeff, not sure if he posts anymore. Real thoroughbred of a player and wouldn't look out of place playing at a reasonable level Im sure

What are your thoughts on Americans. Generalise please.

Fat

Favourite place when travelling and why? Exclude Koh Tao.

Sell am Zee. Described above.

How did you find your regular poker game in China?

We were in a restaurant and there is a round table behind some screens so you cant see it from the street or indeed when you walk in. We mooch over and they are playing some gambling game, Beat the Landlord, I think, they are frenzied. Get talking to one of the lads and he mentions poker. We played there the next week before it got moved to a house. Its a cash game, plays roughly 2-4. The first time playing alone with 6 Chinese lads, I dont know that well, in a gaff with big thick metal doors was good lols. In all honesty though almost no risk, like I said, China not how you'd think. People are not going to be bothering you once you mind your own business.
Nice one dude. Sound for the effort.

Pints soon. Wp.

[Closed_Account]

What do the Swiss think of Toblerone?

As far as I know they think......

Its out on its own,

Rectangular chocoloate,

Thats toblerone



Tasty.

[Closed_Account]

Great well Sam.

What age are you?

I recently turned 30. Fucked is what I am!

Thoughts on Satnavs life ramblings in the BBV?

She is honest. I think she is too open. Sometimes far too much. That said, I don't skip her posts. I guess a significant % of the BBV threads appeal is encouraged voyeurism.

That feeling when you leave a casino @ 7am and the daylight hits and stings your eyes. Beautiful of Painful?


That depends on one very, very obvious question!!!


Between the age of 20-23, most weekend nights would end with me @ a poker table(And i knew it before i went out) no matter what opportunities would arise(women). This genuinely makes me cringe when i think about it enough and it's a big regret of mine. Do you have similar regrets?


Literally the same. I was trying to recall if I ever hooked up in college. I really struggle to think of any. I always had girlfriends but if I didn't a night out ended with poker, or the night out was skipped for poker. That was where I was. I am, I guess a relatively late bloomer when it comes to women. In my teens I was in the mix but for a decent chunk of my twenties, they really did not interest me that much. I have no female friends really.


Your thoughts on the perception that Dublin inner city is an absolute shithole and completely gone to the dogs?

I love the filth. The junkies. The beggars. The Liffey looking utterly disgusting. The tourists been caroled into pubs like sheep. Dublin has character and soul, we shouldn't forget that. That said I don't think it is anywhere near as bad as people make out. Okay avoid a few hotspots but plenty of wonderful places you could go, sit undisturbed and enjoy the city in peace.

Fav fast food?

Zaytoon, chicken sish. I'm looking forward to a Borzas chipper when I get home.

Wire or Sopranos?

Fucking tough question. I think I need to say The Wire, as I have watched it close to four times. The Sopranos is more a commitment and probably a more sophisticated show tbf

Cheers Sam. Great well.

Thanks very much. Glad you are enjoying it.

[Closed_Account]

Class well Sam good to see you're keeping well.

1. Can you explain to me what's the German thought process on buying rounds?

I can not. It is bizarre. I think they are, on the whole a tight people. I hate the feeling though that they must think they are getting one over on you, as because of sheer painful awkwardness to dip into to pay for yet another round


2. What's the best night out you ever had?

Jesus that's an easy one. FFS. Tough question. I think it was my best friends wedding where I was best man. My friends all consider me utterly unreliable and with good reason.For example I did not go to the stag party weekend because I had drank myself into a stupor the night before and was finding religion under the covers. So, up until a few minutes before the speech I was planning on backing out. I didn't in the end but I was terrified. The speech went really well. I cried. My Friends cried. The moment it finished I just felt so empowered. A few things happened during the evening and I did a good job of keeping things ticking over and avoiding drama bombs. The night finished with me and my close friends having a quite drink watching night turn to day. Nobody said anything and there was just this wonderful sense of peaceful happiness that is hard to find.


3. If you could change 1 aspect of your past what would it be?

The amount of money I have wasted, when I had it. I know now how hard it is to get, especially when you really need it and I hate thinking about loot I gave away being a mongoloid.

4. What's the worst life beat you've ever experienced?

The breakup with my former partner. I really loved her,and thought Id be with her forever. The split was unavoidable,we are both happier now. That said the thought of my daughter not having her Mum and Dad under the same roof waking up with the every morning breaks my heart.

5. Aside from your daughter best life win?

Worrying that I cant think of an answer. I am proud of getting through my HDIP. I was working, studying, raising groodle and under huge financial pressure while trying to maintain a relationship with someone whose self worth was being chipped away as she could not find work, I thought I had moved beyond the point of being able to get through studies. I actually worked hard which academically I never had had to and got a first which was a good result.

Thanks for the read dude go for a few Guinness when you get home?

Absolutely man. Would love to.

[Lord Sir Banter]

hi

[BuChan]

fucking great read. cheers for the shout out, deffo never had more fun at the tables than some of those pottastic SE games. seriously homesick after reading this, mega session someday bro!

[Closed_Account]

Good well so far Sam. Keep it bookmarked for your book

Estimated lifetime wins/loses for a) Poker b) the wheel?

Jesus. I wish I knew. I have this nagging feeling I am a winning player but the likely truth is I'm being delusional like the rest of the world. Genuinely have no idea. b) Wheel usually went hand in hand with booze, as such very speculative, Id guess 20k maybe. I know I bust a five figure live tank over the course of a week when I was younger tackling it so could even be more


Have you ever cried leaving a casino/tournament over how much you lost or how bad you ran?

No, an overriding sense of calm usually takes over me when I bust the final loot. Like at that stage, I've usually been up for days, exhausted, hungover, once the tank is done in all those options disappear for a while and it calms me.

I've slammed tables, kicked walls over running bad but never ACTUALLY cried afaik



I remember you cutting off your hood so you could get into the SE. Any other bizarre lengths you went for a game?

I have gone to interviews abroad for the weekend, I have had a friend in hospital who desperately needed me to take care of his cat, I have........etc etc Many an bizarre tale has been told so I could spend the clean 48 hours potting like a madman. I guess the hoody cutting incident was a low point, I cant really remember the details around it at this stage!

Have you misplayed or misread a hand so bad that you want the ground to open up and swallow you?

Yeah, I think it was V HeeHawsCantona, was defo a guy from here. Mid table SE game which was running 2-5 but was playing very big. I was playing over 1k I remember that. Pot is opened and I call with suited connectors. So long ago now the details have faded, but I made a straight flush on the end of a paired board, where he had the nut house. I though he was super strong and I misread my hand as a six high flush so only called to close the action. Cost me around 700 euro. Should have cost me the 1k stack too as I was foaming at the mouth opening anything that blinked, but that was one of those days that poker decided I was going to win a chunk

Give us a diary of a standard 24 hour day in the life while living in a China from when you get up in the morning til you get some shut eye.

It varies. Depending on my timetable, I get up between 9-12 and mosey down to get a Starbucks like the boorish pig dog I am. I teach around 12 hours a week. Mooch into school,either a 12 cent bus ride or a two euro twenty minute taxi fare, then prepare some stuff and do my classes. Tuesdays, Thursdays I train with my football team, Sunday I play a match. I play badminton and basketball with the kids so depending on my humor will do that sometimes.
After work I hit the gym, fours days a week I lift weights and swim. The other days I just swim. I never spend more than an hour in the gym. In the evening around six or seven I will go out to a restaurant with my girlfriend or my work friends. I get on unbelievably well with my colleagues and they are genuinely good pals in their own right. I have not cooked once since I have been here, as eating out is just so cheap.
In the evening I will read for an hour or so, then a few times a week will watch a film or a series or whatever. I try and limit series to one hour a day. Sleep between 12 and 2.


What exactly are you teaching at the moment. How does it work, and how much bluffing do you use on an average day (i.e language barrier issues, the odd white lie etc)

At the moment I teach IGCSE and A Level English to Chinese kids who are going to go to Uni abroad. There is of course some cross over to ESL teaching. The job I am debating taking would be World History and Language but I have made up my mind as of yet. I haven't ruled anything out-stay here next year, move to the new job or return home to somewhere in Europe. Teaching you need to be able to think on your feet and bluff the blockers on occasion but luckily I am very good at my job. It would probably be the nut worst job to be bad at or not enjoy doing

Have you encountered any 'Shit, i'm fucked here' moments wandering how from a late night gamble in Ireland or anywhere else where a) You did the absolute case loots b) A couple of dodgy looking fuckers were making a beeline for you.

Never been robbed or anything like that. Re doing the loots yeah, unfortunately few episodes in my closet. The week before I was due to travel I went bananas and busted every penny I had put aside for the trip. Travelling with a mate and a couple so would have really been fooking him over if I bailed. Luckily, Troy, live Dublin most of you prob know, reg gave me a chunk from which I extorted a loan from the Credit Onion and off I went.

Second time was unfortunate. I had been busto in Oz, met Halfbaked and he put me in a game for a week or so and I ran up around 8k. More than enough to keep travelling. Agreed to meet my mates again in Auckland, but was stuck two days there before they arrived. In that time I managed to plunder the lot. Beanless. Literally. I didnt feel too bad or panicked or anything, a little remorseful I guess. I got a job lifting carpets for some Turk who paid me 30 dollars a day to roar abuse at me while enjoying Im sure the magnificent erection it gave him. I felt worse then tbf.


Cheers Sam

No prob man. Must get down to see you and the family when I am back with the ape.

[KevIRL]

No Q's, but great well Sam, wp.

[Wesley Harms]

I managed to plunder the lot. Beanless. Literally. I didnt feel too bad or panicked or anything, a little remorseful I guess. I got a job lifting carpets for some Turk who paid me 30 dollars a day to roar abuse at me while enjoying Im sure the magnificent erection it gave him. I felt worse then tbf.

This is gold

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[Lplated]

This is such a class well

Hopefully it might serve as a starting point for what would become an epic semi-autobiographical novel.

[Wesley Harms]

It's all in the delivery

[Guest]

[Closed_Account]

Do you think you lack focus?

I would have said Yes in the past. Absolutely. At the moment Meh, I'm not so sure. I feel quite sharp and focused at this moment. Turns out I am absolutely one of these people who needs to be working.

Where do you expect to be in 5 years time?

Not a rashers what country it will be, hopefully doing something off my own bat, small teaching grind school perhaps, something like that. Huge huge opportunities for that here and like I said place dripping in cash. Id like to have a few more kids nipping around the place.

binning chips - some of your best stories please?

My favourite binning chips incident was down in Waterford, some absolute fucking wild west game that looked like it was going to improve into a full on brawl at any moment. You had to win the pot, then win the pot in a way that didn't get your face caved in as-well. AKQJ10 was the only other Dub in the game as far I remember. Loads of slackjawed types circling the game, and a kind of scary vibe. That said was still binning like a mad man. Had four monkey chips swimming around in my socks and shuffled off to the cage a few hours later fully intact with around 20 times the money I sat in the game with

self destruction - tell us some stories?

Ha! Think I have thrown in a few. Blacked out in Bangkok, Thailand once, woke up with no idea where I was. Literally no idea, but there was an armed guard in the room, always a worrying sign. Turns out I had gone to the airport and tried to run through to get a plane, presumably with the intention of getting back to Ireland. I think that was probably a lucky escape.

a couple of pots that still linger in the memory for one reason or another?

A pot in the SE with Oberon haunts me. We played a really big pot which I came out on the right side of. He had like 17 quid in ones and I said Ah sure keep it and try spin it up. I joked that he´d probably run it up and stack me by the end of the night. Around six hours later Oberon has over 1k and just about covers me. The last pot of the night we played one for all the marbles. Quite the lols about that one.

I remember a pot from Final Table of Lakes of Killarney. It was 20k or so ftw and I went to FT as chip leader. I made the mistake of boozing heavily the previous day. By the FT I had given up, I just could not face anothers day play. I hadnt the energy and had pushed it too far the night before. With 5 left I remember making an almost conscious decision to give up. I opened J6H utg and got it all in V one guy who could bust me. The pot itself was not that interesting but it was a pretty expensive and important lesson to learn.

I have fond memories of a pot I played V Murat in a NL 2-5 game in the Fitz, which was unusual as we usually played in the SE. I was in God mode and had run 500 squid up to touching 2k. Murat had close to the same and was splashing around even more than usual. I had As5s in a raised pot. The flop came 5x 3x 4x rainbow. A terribad guy, one of the student doctors who plays there, lead for the pot and someone moved in for 200 behind him. Murat was next to act and moved in without any thought for all the money. I had an unwritten rule about folding top pair V this particular punter and did not feel like changing it. I was up against 56 from the short and Murats A3. Story has a good ending actually, held like a champ. Only time I have ever cashed out from a NL game there for over 5k.

Cheers. Hope your well Noel.

[Closed_Account]

Still LMAO here. Great well Sam. Fair Play.

I love your honesty & humour and wish you great things for the future.

What ever happened to Halfbaked ?

I genuinely dont know. Id guess his tight, calculated profitable style of play caught up with him and he got in deep with some triad money lenders.

Do you get to see your daughter ?

Yeah. I have a good relationship with the mother at this stage. I spent all my holidays in Berlin this year, costs a fortune flying over and back but fuck it. She will with me for the whole summer which starts nexts week so very, very excited. I felt a huge dollop of sympathy for the guy posting in the BB thread about custody issues. Like I dont get why women get utter equality in every arena, or expect it, with good reason, but expect more when it comes to kids. I found the whole experience hugely degrading and can understand how in cases, things turn truely sour. I tentatively have wrote a short screenplay along those lines, maybe one day will try and ship it to someone.

Would you wing it back to Dublin for a reunion of all the old SE regs ?

Ill be back in Berlin in three days, a week later in Dublin. Looking forward to catching up with a few heads. Would 100% be up for some chunky, lathered up cash game, penis measuring in the SE!

Rugby or GAA ?

To watch; Rugby, but it is very close. To play; GAA. I played a fair bit over here, pretty affirming as wasnt the best standard. I was good when I was younger, then really shit when I moved to Senior Club level. I just never made the jump, looking back I would work harder on the physical fitness side of my game but that ship has sailed!

Biggest cash game Pot you have ever lost ?

The biggest cash game pot I lost, or remember losing was actually in the Jackpot in a roe game. The line up was Sean Gregory R.I.P, Sami, Adrian Walsh, Conor D, Mullens, Oberon, and Victor. Those ROE games there was carnage. I got it all in preflop five eays with KKJ10 ds, (it was that kind of game!) for around 800 squid covered by all but one, I floped a King, turned a live flushdraw, and got rivered by hitting a jack which made someone a gutterball. That was the first time I ever lost 2k in a night actually now that I think of it.

Cheers man. Glad you enjoyed it.

[Closed_Account]

Have never met you but always liked your posts and you seem like good people.

Thanks very much dude!

What level of under age and perhaps senior sport did you play? Types?

I played soccer with Joeys in Sallynoggin ddsl. I played GAA for Cuala from second year on. I think we were Division 2 maybe one year Division 1. I swam with Glenalbyn until I was 17. Swimming I was good at until I was 14 or 15 or so, then stopped growing really and struggled through another few years. Wonderful sport though. I played rugby for my school (I was absolutely shite). My Dad and Mum encouraged me to do as much sport as I could and I am glad they did. I remember my school being worried I was doing too much but in fact it really helped me focus or organize my time.

You win an all expenses week holiday with your family, where do you take them?

Jesus that would be nice. I think my daughter is at any age where she loves Theme Parks, maybe DisneyLand in Paris, love the city and Im sure herself would enjoy the experience.

Same as above but with friends rather than family?

Got to be Vegas I guess!

You have been giving 100k but have to make an investment which you cant cash out for a year, what stock would you choose?

I know next to nothing about stocks or shares so would probably be in good shape to get rich, and quick. Do Tinder sell shares?

If Ireland make the 2018 World Cup, will you attend?

With Green still being given a central role in midfield and Ward looking like a contender for a starting spot, its not an option I envisage arising. I would ABSOLUTELY love to

You seem close with posters on here, how many, if any, did you know before Poker?

I didnt know any before poker. I think I played live maybe 90% of my time for two years, after a while you start seeing people you play with as pals. Go for drinks with them, help each other out, that kind of thing. Some of the posters here would be close freinds, and plenty who I would enjoy having a few pints with

What age are you?

Im 30! The sands of time wait for no man! Fucked is what I am!

Do you have twitter?

I had to set one up for my teaching training but I literally never used it. Half humouring the idea of playing live for the summer, if I do I may set one up. Think I would probably enjoy it, gruesome individual that I am!

Cheers for this

No problem. Happy to do it.

[Closed_Account]

I think thats it pretty much. Close pal, who doesnt post here but furiously rail heavens asked me two questions which made me lol.

1. When asked a question, what is the % ratio of your responses between truth and mendacity?
2. And more importantly, "4 inches taller or an inch longer penis?"

As we talked about thats an easy one. Ill take the 4 inches. May aswell be hung for a sheep as a lamb.

Right, thats all folks. Hope it was enjoyable. Honoured to join the names who have done one before me. Goodluck.

[Lazare]

I think thats it pretty much. Close pal, who doesnt post here but furiously rail heavens asked me two questions which made me lol.

1. When asked a question, what is the % ration of your responses between truth and mendacity?
2. And more importantly, "4 inches taller or an inch longer penis?"

As we talked about thats an easy one. Ill take the 4 inches. May aswell be hung for a sheep as a lamb.

Right, thats all folks. Hope it was enjoyable. Honoured to join the names who have done one before me. Goodluck.

Fanfooking tastic read dude

Xie Xie

Danka

[Lazare]

Who in their right mind wouldn't want a three inch cock?

[The Situation]

Great read J, genuinely enjoyed that.

[KevIRL]

Fair play Sam, great well and as many others have said a great read.

We'll give ionapaul a few days before he gets chucked in.

[hotspur]

Enjoyable read.

Would buy book.

[eamonhonda]

fantastic read, if youre home and playing a game soon i will try and make it to meet you, fair play

[PokerPiper]

Top man, would love a drink when you are home. Thanks again and take care.

Nice words Noel. Seriously think a 'gathering' is in order to 'inhale' some pints of plain and possibly retire to the SE to replay the days of old with Sam and any other degens who care to partake :-)

[smoothcall]

Great read Sam, no better man to describe the grimmer aspects of degen life, get writing that book!

[Denny Crane]

Jaysus seems like I missed the golden times of poker by not playing in the SE!

[NoRiverRequired]

Contender for best thread on IPB thus far IMO. WP.

[AKQJ10]

Much love dude. The memory of that pot with kayroo and the tipping for an orbit that followed is still so fresh.

[mdoug]

3) I remember one night you were in a bad place. Obv skint and tilting hard and some semi homeless guy in the jackpot who would usually be the bottom feeder but was winning a oner on the night in question objected to you short buying in short - you left in fury and went for flannerys - I barely knew you, and it was before the incident in 1 above. I followed you and tried to drive you home as you were in a bad place and I didn't think Flannerys was the spot for you. I reckon you queued for Flannerys despite not needing to just so I would fck off and leave you alone - I guess you were enjoying the "sweet release". Not sure where I am going but it sticks out in my mind - the point I suppose is to recognise when you are vulnerable and accept help when somebody is offering it.

Perfect state of mind for Flannerys to be fair

[Flushdraw]

Contender for best thread on IPB thus far IMO. WP.

Nope, it's not.













Needs at least another 60 posts before it can be considered IMO

[Kayroo]

Much love dude. The memory of that pot with kayroo and the tipping for an orbit that followed is still so fresh.

Holy shit was I in that pot?

I think I have a lifetime hex on Jbravado. Literally cannot get it in bad enough against him to lose a hand.

In all seriousness though, for those who don't know him here it might be easy to think of Jbravado as a degen (he is) or a crazy fucker with a wild life (he is and does) but he is also one of the most honorable, decent and genuine guys I've ever had the pleasure of meeting through poker. Great well mate.

[Jam-Fly]

wow, really fantastic read. Thanks for doing it.

[doke]

Epic well, wd.

I was never an SE reg, I think it was already in terminal decline by the time I started playing. Plus my brother played all his poker in the Fitz pretty much so I ended up just following him there. SE was an amazing place to play though back then.

I remember talking to you about a hand after the Lakes of Killarney. Didn't realise you were so hungover, you hid it well

Also remember meeting you and Michael O'Sullivan when I was in Berlin. Good times.

It's always interesting to me that a game as formulaic as poker attracts so many different types, and we all end up with pretty much our own story. Gl in all you do in the future.

[Keane]

Loved this Sam, vwp

[Rufio]

Great read Sam.

And can only concur what others have said before me, you are a gent! All that said, I don't think I'd want to go back to those long nights in the jackpot... well maybe once.

[Bubbleking]

cliff notes on the hand that induced super monkey tilt with Keith or have I missed it?

[DeadParrot]

Great well dude.

[danutpeddler]

Fair play Sam.
Great to have so many good and bad stories/experiences under your belt at the ripe young age of thirty.
And that's the crux of it, you're only thirty!! Sure you've another 5 years of proper messing if you want it.
As long as you don't lose that lovely mind or yours, you'll be grand!