jbravado in the well

[Raoul Duke III]

Notorious degenerate, purveyor of Joyce-esque stream of consciousness non-fiction and sleeve-slicing fashion icon jbravado has agreed to be lowered into the well for interrogation by the rabble.

Let us commence proceedings:

1. What's the largest animal you could throw over a crossbar?
2. Tell us your most debauched tale of prolonged debauchery.
3. Chinese chicks. How do they rate on the global scale?

Fire away men.

[eamonhonda]

Longest binge without sleep?

Cocktail of choice?

Worst shape to show up in work and complete day without getting fired?

Greatest life decision you have ever made?

Biggest losing/winning bet?

[Micknail]

Biggest regret?

Biggest achievement?

[mdoug]

Have you, and if no would you, bang a friends mom if she was gagging?
Are you still going to go to the chinese casino's even with all the recent news just for the laugh?
Origin(country) of the best ride you have had?
Most memorable night from Chinaland?

just hoping to keep this debaucherous as possible

[Rufio]

Cheers for doing this Sam,

If you had to live the life of somebody else (i.e. Freaky Friday but not a relative) who would you choose and why? - Remember not only are you taking their body and life but they take yours also.

How much money did you receive for your communion and confirmation? What did you spend it on?

If you could pick one fictional character to be real, who would you choose and why?

Have you ever done anything in the past that you now look back on and say "I disgust myself", what was it and would you do it again?

[Theresa]

Have you ever done anything in the past that you now look back on and say "I disgust myself", what was it and would you do it again?

Will come back with questions later but this question is gold.

OBV the answer is YES and YES but what it was should be interesting.

[ionapaul]

Really looking forward to this! We really should have a well going at all times - once a week. Loads of interesting people here and everyone has to have some unique and interesting stories at least.

[40something]

Walking down Grafton Street you see some cash on the ground. What is the smallest amount it would need to be before you actually try to pick it up and put it in your pocket?

Ever have a threesome? If so were they both girls?

Biggest Live poker win / Biggest online poker win?

[Raoul Duke III]

Really looking forward to this! We really should have a well going at all times - once a week. Loads of interesting people here and everyone has to have some unique and interesting stories at least.

Well volunteered.

[Zod]

Have you ever woke up, remembered what you did the night before and immediately gone for an STI test?

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[Dice75]

Have you always been involved in teaching or did you work at anything else prior?

Could you understand a work Sickpuppy said the first time you met him?

Favourite place for a Guinness?

Ever been to Vegas and if so any stories?

Pokerwise are you still playing at all and would you consider yourself primarily a Tourney or Cash player?

Could you settle abroad long-term or will you always end up back in Ireland?

tyty Sam

[thechamp87]

Do you think you'd be happier right now if you'd never found poker?

If you had to choose one, would you return to Ireland and never be allowed leave, or never be allowed return?

Favourite restaurant in Dublin city centre?

You have a kid, right? Your thoughts when you found out she was pregnant?

Your foolproof hangover curing process? Mine is a swim in the sea and a cold can of coke.

Were you a good student in school/college? What did you study in college?

Most expensive night out? Including drinks/dinner/gambling/poker ie. largest amount spent between taking first drink and waking up.

Do you find teaching fulfilling/rewarding? What age group are teaching currently? And what are you teaching?

If someone handed you €1,000,000 tomorrow can you break down how much you'd spend this weekend and on what, and what you'd do with the rest?

Do you read much? Favourite type of book?

Top 3 favourite sports to watch?

Cheers mate, hope you're well!

[Closed_Account]

I'll start this the moment I figure out how to multi quote stuff like I assume normal people can. Tyty.

Hopefully it will be somewhere near as entertaining as some that have gone before it.

[LuckyLloyd]

- From what can be gathered from your posts on here, at one point you were in Dublin with your baby's mum and then...you weren't. What happened with that (pass on this question by all means but I'm expecting this to be a fairly warts and all affair)?
- What were your parent's professions? Would they be approving of the path you've taken in life? Would you care necessarily?
- How much of your decisions and choices are truly concious? By this I mean - is your real life dream getting it together, finding a job you are happy to do, a place you are happy to be in long term and being at peace grinding out the whole business of being an adult? Or are you just a wanderer at heart and unlikely to ever want to straighten your tie and be 'normal'?
- Have you read this? Do you ever think you could write a book? If not, why not?
- Does travelling and living abroad ingrain a deeper sense of Irishness or fondness for Ireland iyo? Your reasons for answering yes or no?
- Religion, your thoughts?
- Sketch out the basic principles of a political party you would be willing to vote for and maybe do some volunteering to support?

=============

I genuinely love your posting, and back when we were both playing live cards you were always a gent to be in the same card room as. Thanks for doing this.

[Flushdraw]

I'll start this the moment I figure out how to multi quote stuff like I assume normal people can. Tyty.

Hopefully it will be somewhere near as entertaining as some that have gone before it.

Just hit the '+' button beside the 'Quote' button on every post you want to quote, and then hit 'Reply'

[Denny Crane]

What's your current drink of choice?

Years ago I went on a book buying binge pulling recommendations from everywhere and somehow I ended up with your fathers book on the list (still no idea how!) is there any potential to do one yourself? What kind of advance would IPB need to put together to get it started?

[dobby]

Do you think you are a nice person? Why or why not?

Where in the world is the one place you would recommend people see?

Biggest score in poker?

Would you rather live a life alone with modest income or be rich and famous with a loving family but having all the shite that comes with being famous too?

[AndyFatBastard]

Daddy or chips?

[Closed_Account]

Notorious degenerate, purveyor of Joyce-esque stream of consciousness non-fiction and sleeve-slicing fashion icon jbravado has agreed to be lowered into the well for interrogation by the rabble.

Let us commence proceedings:

1. What's the largest animal you could throw over a crossbar?
2. Tell us your most debauched tale of prolonged debauchery.
3. Chinese chicks. How do they rate on the global scale?

Fire away men.

Notorious degenerate, purveyor of Joyce-esque stream of consciousness non-fiction and sleeve-slicing fashion icon jbravado has agreed to be lowered into the well for interrogation by the rabble.

Let us commence proceedings:

1. What's the largest animal you could throw over a crossbar?

I would imagine a small pig. The filthy animal.

2. Tell us your most debauched tale of prolonged debauchery.

Im not sure about my longest bout of debauchery, Im sure it will come to me but I do recall the first time I dipped my toes in the murky waters. I was a pretty straight laced kid when I was younger. My folks worked during the day so the lads convinced me to throw a party mid week during school and we all mitched off.

Anywho we had a granny flat at the time and as she was away we held it there. I had no experience of drinking at this stage. Anyway, things escalate quickly into stir bat fooking craziness. My last memory is of a german exchange student headbanging wildly to shit music. My granny had a sunken bath.The place gets absolutely fucking destroyed. I awake naked as the day I was born to find my mother proding me. Im in my grannies arm chair. It is around six oclock. All my grans clothes are gone as the lads thought itd be good lols.

I wasnt alone. Head banging Kraut was lying unconscious in the sunken bath, covered in blood after knocking himself the fook out.



3. Chinese chicks. How do they rate on the global scale?

They are growing on me. I seem to only be attracted to Chinese girls who have a little bit of Westerner in them looks wise, stunted boor that I am. The language and culture barrier has in my experience been hard to overcome. Currently loved up with a Swiss/Chinese girl from Zurich who I may try and stealth impregnate for trapping purposes

Fire away men.

Will try and do a few of these during Engerland game.

[Micknail]

[Closed_Account]

Longest binge without sleep?

Thursday night through to Sunday night. Conservatively 60 hours or so. One hours macro sleep on the couch in the Jackpot. Former poster HalfBaked with me every step of the way.

Cocktail of choice?

Long Vodka. Made with some crazy fucking euphoria inducing drops of something I forget the name of. Chopper from here introduced me to it. Never not had an amazing night after having a few.

Worst shape to show up in work and complete day without getting fired?

The Monday following Suicide 60. I was working in a bank, in Bray. I will never set foot in Bray again. I have referenced it a few times here but while working a cashier monkey I feel asleep mid serving some utter pieball whacking my head of the glass between us. I was not fired per say, but suffice to say I had left within a few weeks.

Greatest life decision you have ever made?

I think coming to China is up there. I was a disgusting human prior to leaving. Marginally less so now. Progress.

Biggest losing/winning bet?

My biggest losing bet was in UCD. I had just gotten a student credit card. I insta withdrew the lot and put it on some obscure Inter Milan short price European fixture. I think all accounted for I had close to 1600 on it. They drew 0-0. Snigger.

I never remember the winning ones! I guess my favorite gambling related scoop was watching my childhood pal Michael OSullivan scoop the IWF for 160 odd K; when I had invested the guts of my case loots on 10%. I railed it online with Theresa from here, knowing full well I had not a pot to piss on and a baby on the way.

I'M too retarded to figure out how to quote shit properly. Hopefully it is readable as is.

[Closed_Account]

Biggest regret?

When I was 21 I decided to travel the world for a year. I was incredibly close to my granny, spending most of my evenings with her watching Coronation Street and the likes while potting away. At this stage she was touching 90 years of age. She asked me not to go, and said I would not see her alive again. I knew she was telling the truth. I could just feel it and I wish I had not ignored my gut instinct. I went anyway. Selfish age I guess. She died when I was in Cambodia and I swear to God the night it happened I had this horrific feeling in my stomach that something was wrong.

Biggest achievement?

That is an easy one. Whatever marginal role I played in the creation of my beautiful daughter.

This is tougher than I thought!

[Guest]

Why do you drink when the next day you feel so bad?Have never seen anyone get the fear as bad.

Do you think playing poker for a living us a waste of youth especially being staked?

Worst night you ever had on the steel wheel?

Is your future in Asia? Sams school of english perhaps?

Do you feel you have massively underacheived in poker? do you care?

Where will you be in 5 years time 10 or more omportantly in 3 weeks?

[Closed_Account]

Have you, and if no would you, bang a friends mom if she was gagging?

You despicable creature.


Are you still going to go to the chinese casino's even with all the recent news just for the laugh?

I have a regular game here. Its illegal. But not really. Like all things in China. Mind your own business and dont step on the wrong toes and people go about their business. They all are Chinese and have way more money than me. They treat playing with a "Laowai" as a novelty and are all nice guys. It subsides my wages nicely and honestly I couldnt lose in the game if I tried its that soft. I steer clear of `casinos´....for the most part


Origin(country) of the best ride you have had?

Switzerland. By a million fucking miles.

Most memorable night from Chinaland?

[BThis sound made up but it is not. Scouts honour. Wasnt a scout tbf. Promise though. Wouldnt boast about it, as the sting in the tale will obviously reveal.

Around three weeks ago, German girl (not Herr Mutter) was coming over to visit me, night before she was due to arrive I had a serious case of the dia-ree-hee-hoos and went 12 rounds with my jacks. As she is a relatively high roller and I cant function in the real worldz/couldn't face cleaning said offensive toilet/ combined with / grinding the more successful than I am angle, I thought fuck it, we'll stay in hotels while she is here.

Anywho, she came over: great time had. Fast forward to present day. Again, because I am a dysfunctional retardo who hates loot couldnt face returning to my apartment and was slothing around in hotels for a week. On Monday, swallowed my pride and returned to aforementioned cesspit. Electricity obv cut. Toilet skids (too generous a term in this case) now encrusted.

Fuck that. Ride it out. Six weeks left here. Fuck the electricity. Ill have to eat every chicken in the place. Ill just stay out til sleepy time, pound the gym 9-5, and get my pound of flesh in hot water. Fuck knows wont be getting teh values otherwise. And so it was. Til tonight.

Post gym, decide to peel a meal in a local Western grovel. Drink EVERY FUCKING DROP and end up hooking up with an amazingly hot Western girl we have nicknamed chunkymonkey (genuinly beautiful tbf to her albeit big boned) Hammered the electricity gone angle, candle lit fumblings, but in my haze of being a nefarious cunt forgot about, the afforementioned encrusted, symbol of all my failings. Trainspotting jacks.

That was until now. This morning. When she saw it in the true light of all seven Gods. Agony.



Cliffs: Toilet humour. Got a go of the box. I FILTH.]

just hoping to keep this debaucherous as possible

[/B]

Worthy of a repost as also refers to your above question!

[Fiery Wasabi]

What were you doing in Berlin, are you fluent in German and did you find it difficult to learn ?
Personally I love it over there, but why does everybody assume that because you speak English, that you must be from there ?
What part of China are you in, is there a drink/pub culture over there and what's the local brew like.?
Are you likely to invest in a flick-hatchet for when you are out playing poker.?
Brave man for doing this, Best of luck .
Smurph says Hi!

[careca]

LOL. Brilliant already.

[mickste]

Your ideal line up of regs back in the fun times of the sporting

Best and worst players you have played with

Please tell a few tales of going on uber monkey tilt eg tipping dealers 25 for losing pots etc

The scariest situation you have found yourself in?

Much love

[Closed_Account]

Fook me. Tough questions.

Cheers for doing this Sam,

If you had to live the life of somebody else (i.e. Freaky Friday but not a relative) who would you choose and why? - Remember not only are you taking their body and life but they take yours also.

The Pope. Id like to know how it feels to have utter faith in an afterlife or indeed find out if the head honcho himself feels in all likelyhood it is complete nonsense.

How much money did you receive for your communion and confirmation? What did you spend it on?

I remember my Communion well. I got around 40 quid. I spent it on a pair of white Kangaroo shoes, which had a zip by the side where I stashed my remaining loot. I also invested shrewdly in the game "Crossfire". I can not for the life of me remember a single thing about my Confirmation, apart from the standard making up lies to the priest about sins I had committed. Shudder.

If you could pick one fictional character to be real, who would you choose and why?

Maxim Tsigalko, cheat player from Champ. Id like to ask him why, when I had almost brought Shamrock Rovers to the pinnacle of European football did he decide to submit a transfer request asking to move to a bigger club the day before our Champions League Final.

Have you ever done anything in the past that you now look back on and say "I disgust myself", what was it and would you do it again?

Yes. Absolutely. Without getting into too much detail-being with people for the wrong reasons.(makes me sound like a hooker, Im not!) No, I can catagorically say I would not make that particular mistake again.

[mickste]

Maxim tsigalko, best answer To a question I've ever seen

[Closed_Account]

Walking down Grafton Street you see some cash on the ground. What is the smallest amount it would need to be before you actually try to pick it up and put it in your pocket?

Id pick up 1c. Infact I would have to pick it up, or I would know with close to 99% accuracy that something terrible would happen to me that day. Standard line at that stage would be to find some water to throw it into and make a wish.

Ever have a threesome? If so were they both girls?

Funnily enough, I recently had the oppurtunity. Unfortunately the Irish in my seeped out and I didnt want to imagine, someone, I am pretty sure Im going to marry the life out of (probably literally) doing slutty things in front of another person. The idea used not to appeal to me in the slightest, but I guess I may be won round to it. Fooking porn corrupting normality.

Biggest Live poker win / Biggest online poker win?

Biggest win live was 5k in some tourney. I think online it was 6k.

Rooney!!!!

[Closed_Account]

Have you ever woke up, remembered what you did the night before and immediately gone for an STI test?

Im a procrastinator.

[V for Vendetta]

You've been on a bit of a health/fitness/self image improvement journey over the last while. What have you done and what more would you like to do?

You seem to have a real lack of self confidence and are generally a shy fellow from my dealings with you. Where did this stem from and is it something you'd like to change?

What bores you and what excites you?

[Guest]

Good stuff so far sam

Last time you spunked all the dough?
Most degen thing youve seen in the Jackpot?
Most ridiculous thing youve done when tilted? (mine would be throwing my laptop off a 3rd floor balcony and reversing over it in my car)
Any Dublin degens still owe you money?
do you enjoy poker if/when you play it anymore?
Will you set foot in a casino when you come back to dublin?
You are much loved on here for your honesty and antics. Do you ever cringe at some of the stuff youve posted in the past and whether it could cause embarrasment in the future in the normie world? (obv youve not posted up anything as bad as hawkeyes story but how would you feel about your parents or normal friends reading through all your posts?)
Youve alluded to it in previous answers but would you say people have a pretty innacurate view of you based on your posting style, you tend to post up only the more degen aspects of your life, obv for the entertainment value. Does it ever annoy you that this is how you are viewed?

[Closed_Account]

If you had to work in an office 9-5 type job, which type of role would you pick?

When I was young I thought I wanted to become a banker. It was 9-5, more like 8-6 and it was one of the most soul sapping experiences of my life. If I don't believe in something I am not good at it, to the extent that I simply can not function. I'm not saying teaching is a million miles removed from a 9-5 office type role but there are enough moments of a guess decent human interaction to make it enjoyable. I don't think I could or would work an office job again.


40-year-old you - who's that person going to be do you think?

I hope I will be a well rounded, actual grown up, financially stable surrounded by people who love me and people I love back. I guess Ill probably be hairier.

In work now, co clearly will grind through a few of these!

[Closed_Account]

Best book of last year?

The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg. Not a self help book! Ha but really helped me break a few bad habits, obviously, before I went back doing them again!

Reading Charlottes Webb for the first time with my daughter over the Christmas had us both weeping like a little girl. In her defense.....

Top three books of all time?

The Dubliners. I didn't like it the first time I read it. Now, marooned in China I read a little bit every day.

The Gambler. Dostoevsky was clearly a madman. One of us. Roulletenburg is something I quote plenty; "In Geneva I pawned my watch". Fair fooks!

Shut up and Deal by Jesse May. No other poker book captures the World as well and when I was involved in poker I read it adnauseum. I tried to read it again recently and was like Meh, but wont forget the shift it put in back in the day.

Cheers Hitch.

[CHDad]

Is Bray basically like a poor town in China? Run down, bit of a dump and full of Asians?

[Closed_Account]

Have you always been involved in teaching or did you work at anything else prior?

As mentioned a brief ill-fated stint with AIB when I was out of college. I worked a fulltime barman with Thunder Road Cafe for a year too. Bleak. Leecherous, English women pointing plastic penises in my direction wasn't quite enough to turn me gay but it did put me off women for quite some time


Could you understand a work Sickpuppy said the first time you met him?

I can remember the day I met Sickpuppy, I was playing the FITZ EOM; potless , I bubbled V Mick is some random ludicrous hand. Id never met the man but he told me he had a ticket already and asked did I want to play it. He sometimes comes across badly here, but he really is good people and looking forward to having a few pints with him soon.

Favourite place for a Guinness?

Fitzgeralds in Sandycove.

Ever been to Vegas and if so any stories?

Wouldn't survive it

Pokerwise are you still playing at all and would you consider yourself primarily a Tourney or Cash player?

I don't play very much at all anymore. Once every two weeks maybe. I was primarily a cash game player for years, I hated tournies, I guess because of the nature of my temperament and because I've spent a lot of time keeping myself broke it was natural that I would gravitate towards tournies. If I was to play now, and I might over the summer I would play only cash, maybe some festivals. I have never been in a position where I could afford to lose the pot, quite looking to playing a but actually now the pressure is off.

Could you settle abroad long-term or will you always end up back in Ireland?

No, my home is in Ireland. I love where I live more than anywhere else in the world.
tyty Sam

No probs man. Few pints when Im back.

[Closed_Account]

Do you think you'd be happier right now if you'd never found poker?

Really tough question to answer. I think it has certainly slowed down the course of my life and potential to a very large extent. I think if I had to give a Yes/No answer it would be hard not to say Yes.That said I am a pretty happy at the moment though so who knows!

If you had to choose one, would you return to Ireland and never be allowed leave, or never be allowed return?

One million percent return and can never leave. I fucking love Ireland.

Favourite restaurant in Dublin city centre?

Ha Zaytoon! Im not a cultured eater.

You have a kid, right? Your thoughts when you found out she was pregnant?

I was over the moon. A little context I guess. Myself and my partner at the time were expecting a child. We went for a check up, and she asked me to put my hand on her tummy. She asked me was everything Ok, and I felt really sick. I genuinely knew in that moment there was something wrong, and it turned out the child had died. When she was became pregnant again I had never been so happy

Your foolproof hangover curing process? Mine is a swim in the sea and a cold can of coke.

Unfortunately my method is not very cost effective, and usually ends up with me attached to a heart monitor. Ah No, sometimes, I surrender and start drinking again. If I am beyond that point, I just pray. Long and Hard. There is no cure that I know for sure

Were you a good student in school/college? What did you study in college?

I was perfect student up until I was 16 or so, great grades, and balls deep in sport. I peaked to soon a little and limped over the line for my Leaving but still did managed to do Ok I guess.

I was a horrific student in college. I discovered gambling and alcohol. My daily routine was sport, sport, sport then the pub from 2 or three for pool and poker.

Most expensive night out? Including drinks/dinner/gambling/poker ie. largest amount spent between taking first drink and waking up.

The night before I was due to go round the world for 12 months I went out for a SE Kate's going away bash. I went out with Kevin Maloney and Buchan. It cost me all in all close to 3k.

Do you find teaching fulfilling/rewarding? What age group are teaching currently? And what are you teaching?

I do and I don't. One of my favorite books is Why Children Fail by John Holt, a wonderful read for those who haven't. It references the many numerous problems with education, in its traditional form, without offering any realistic alternatives. I feel a bit like that, I guess. It can immensely rewarding and I really enjoy the pastoral and extra curricular role more than the teaching sometimes I guess. I think, despite hating to admit it, it represents me taking the easy way out a little in terms of what I could do with my life. I do not see myself teaching in five years for example.


If someone handed you €1,000,000 tomorrow can you break down how much you'd spend this weekend and on what, and what you'd do with the rest?

When Stuey "The Kid" Ungar took his first World Series of Poker title, one journalist asked him what he would do with the money. His answer: "Gamble it"

Nah, Id give my parents a chunk, my daughter and her mother, pay off any outstanding debts. It would be in my best interests to have as little of it as possible. I don't think it will ever matter to me how much money I have I would just end up spending it faster.

Do you read much? Favourite type of book?

I read religiously. Everything and anything. At the moment, because I guess Im so far from home, Im going through an Irish writers phase

Top 3 favourite sports to watch?

Used to be left cold by rugby, now my favorite by a mile.

GAA

Hurling

Soccer has lost me because of the theatrics and the fact that for some reason the majority of players seem utterly detached from the real world.


Cheers mate, hope you're well!

You too man. Long time no see!

[Theresa]

Enjoying this one dude! Here are my questions:

First place you will go besides home when you and the Swasian get back?

Do you use/Did you use Tinder? Any good stories of loopy birds?

Do you eat the street food in China? Assume youd starve otherwise. Whats your fave dish?

Best IPB footyplayer?

What are your thoughts on Americans. Generalise please.

Favourite place when travelling and why? Exclude Koh Tao.

How did you find your regular poker game in China?

Nice one dude. Sound for the effort.

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[Silver-Tiger]

Great well Sam.

What age are you?

Thoughts on Satnavs life ramblings in the BBV?

That feeling when you leave a casino @ 7am and the daylight hits and stings your eyes. Beautiful of Painful?

Between the age of 20-23, most weekend nights would end with me @ a poker table(And i knew it before i went out) no matter what opportunities would arise(women). This genuinely makes me cringe when i think about it enough and it's a big regret of mine. Do you have similar regrets?

Your thoughts on the perception that Dublin inner city is an absolute shithole and completely gone to the dogs?

Fav fast food?

Wire or Sopranos?


Cheers Sam. Great well.

[Strewelpeter]

I have never been in a position where I could afford to lose the pot

Class

[Closed_Account]

- From what can be gathered from your posts on here, at one point you were in Dublin with your baby's mum and then...you weren't. What happened with that (pass on this question by all means but I'm expecting this to be a fairly warts and all affair)?

No, I dont mind answering it. Unfortunately, and to my contant regret the relationship broke down. It happens I guess. Some of the reasons, in retrospect were within my control, some were absolutely not. I am lucky enough that girl is a fantastic mother, that said it was a horrific period of my life, and there is obviously a lingering constant pain that my daughter is growing up with parents who are not together.


- What were your parent's professions? Would they be approving of the path you've taken in life? Would you care necessarily?

My mother is a teacher, French and German. She also is heavily involved in sport and sits on the Olympic Council of Ireland. My father was heavily involved in gambling when he was younger, he then worked as a magazine editor before becoming an English teacher. They, I am sure, feel like I have not been as focused or as driven as I could I have been to date. My mother disapproved in particular and with good reason!They are realists but we have a fantastic relationship, and I hate the idea of them not being proud of me. I have written many a letter hungover as fuck saying as much!


- How much of your decisions and choices are truly concious? By this I mean - is your real life dream getting it together, finding a job you are happy to do, a place you are happy to be in long term and being at peace grinding out the whole business of being an adult? Or are you just a wanderer at heart and unlikely to ever want to straighten your tie and be 'normal'?

The former obviously! I guess we all portray ourselves on here, as we want people to see us to some extent, whether it is consciously or subconsciously. I have quite adult leanings on the whole, a mortgage, a daughter, at this stage I guess a career which seems to have some potential. I guess the tortured soul postings just read better, but for large chunks of my life I have been blissfully happy. I am very, very priveleged and I am well aware of that.


- Have you read this? Do you ever think you could write a book? If not, why not?

I havent but I will. I think I could, Im just waiting on my advance from IPB! Its flattering to think people throw that around but there is a huge difference from putting up a few throw away posts on an internet forum and writing an engaging book. Id love to think I could but I dont know. I did get an A1 in honors English tbf, my essay was about a gambling addict to attends a GA meeting to win a bet.


- Does travelling and living abroad ingrain a deeper sense of Irishness or fondness for Ireland iyo? Your reasons for answering yes or no?

It absolutely does. For no other reason than the far away hills are greener. I could not wait to leave Ireland, for the lack of oppurtunites it offered me. Now I know for sure it will be where I raise a family.

- Religion, your thoughts?

I think about death a hundred times a day. Literally. I wish religion was real. I wish there was something, but unfortunately deep down we all know there is not. When we are dead what awaits is never ending nothingness, best not to think about it. Religion exploits this which is fair enough, the collateral damage is brings with it is unfortunate

- Sketch out the basic principles of a political party you would be willing to vote for and maybe do some volunteering to support?

I studied Politics in college. I now longer vote and have no political allegiances whatsoever.

=============

I genuinely love your posting, and back when we were both playing live cards you were always a gent to be in the same card room as. Thanks for doing this.

Cheers man. Played some good pots back in the day. A lifetime ago tbf!

[Closed_Account]

What's your current drink of choice?

My current drink of choice is pints of Tiger. They cost 16RMB. Google. I have aquired a starnge taste for mini cans of Bud here. Retro I guess. When I am home I am going to inhale pints of Guiness for a few days.


Years ago I went on a book buying binge pulling recommendations from everywhere and somehow I ended up with your fathers book on the list (still no idea how!) is there any potential to do one yourself? What kind of advance would IPB need to put together to get it started?

Let me know what you thought ffs! Id like to write a book. I have five or six ideas but I guess it will take some random moment of ferocious drive to start it, which I could a be a lifetime waiting for

PM me if the aul lads book is 4/10 or under!

[Bubbleking]

Class well Sam good to see you're keeping well.

1. Can you explain to me what's the German thought process on buying rounds?
2. What's the best night out you ever had?
3. If you could change 1 aspect of your past what would it be?
4. What's the worst life beat you've ever experienced?
5. Aside from your daughter best life win?

Thanks for the read dude go for a few Guinness when you get home?

[Flushdraw]

Good well so far Sam. Keep it bookmarked for your book

Estimated lifetime wins/loses for a) Poker b) the wheel?
Have you ever cried leaving a casino/tournament over how much you lost or how bad you ran?
I remember you cutting off your hood so you could get into the SE. Any other bizarre lengths you went for a game?
Have you misplayed or misread a hand so bad that you want the ground to open up and swallow you?
Give us a diary of a standard 24 hour day in the life while living in a China from when you get up in the morning til you get some shut eye.
What exactly are you teaching at the moment. How does it work, and how much bluffing do you use on an average day (i.e language barrier issues, the odd white lie etc)
Have you encountered any 'Shit, i'm fucked here' moments wandering how from a late night gamble in Ireland or anywhere else where a) You did the absolute case loots b) A couple of dodgy looking fuckers were making a beeline for you.

Cheers Sam

[Closed_Account]

Do you think you are a nice person? Why or why not?

I think on the whole I am good people.For the most part I try and treat people the way I would like them to treat me. My moral compass occassionally wavers but overall I think Id squeek in as a nice person

Where in the world is the one place you would recommend people see?

Zell am See, Austria. We saw it in Band of Brothers and wanted to go. The most majestic lake surrounded by lush green ice capped mountains.

The Silver Strand Co Wicklow. Winding stone steps down to a white sand beach with crystal clear Irish water. I love that beach.



Biggest score in poker?

I guess 11k and it wasnt even my result. Says it all really!

Would you rather live a life alone with modest income or be rich and famous with a loving family but having all the shite that comes with being famous too?

I like my own space, but there is nothing worse than feeling genuinly lonely. Loving family, and riddled groupies please.

Long day at work but I will try and answer a few of these over a few glasses of wine.

[Closed_Account]

Daddy or chips?

Not sure what this means exactly. Something that did come into my head though is, whats the deal with the "Whose your Daddy?" comment in the sack, I dont get it.

[Closed_Account]

Why do you drink when the next day you feel so bad?Have never seen anyone get the fear as bad.

Im better company when I am drinking. Not one of these winners who can enjoy a night socialising without lubing myself up to tolerate the intolerable punters you occassionally have to interact with

Do you think playing poker for a living us a waste of youth especially being staked?

I think staking is an incredibly hard gig and requires super human levels of patience and discipline. I dont know if it is a waste of time per say, but for most people that is absolutely going to be the case.

Worst night you ever had on the steel wheel?

5k. Two seperate runs into town. Too retarded for words.

Is your future in Asia? Sams school of english perhaps?

I really do not know. I have a two year contract but have been approached by two other institutes re next year so am negotiating for the first time in my life. I have no idea what I am doing but feel I am bluffing the blockers thus far. If I am here next year I will 100% open something, even if it is something small, this place is dripping in money and education is the golden goose.

Do you feel you have massively underacheived in poker? do you care?

I dont know. I have a truely dreadful tempermant for the game. I guess I could feel aggrieved to have not binked some donkament or other, but overall I think poker has given me back what I have put into it. At this stage No, I can in all honesty say I do not care

Where will you be in 5 years time 10 or more omportantly in 3 weeks?

I dont know about 5 years but in three weeks Im going to be down at the 40 foot swiming and spending my days on the beach with the groodle.

That or sandwiched in between you, Hedger and the unmentionable one enjoying a few pints on me for a change.

[AndyFatBastard]

Not sure what this means exactly. Something that did come into my head though is, whats the deal with the "Whose your Daddy?" comment in the sack, I dont get it.

Hey I'm not answering the questions round here, pal.

[Closed_Account]

What were you doing in Berlin, are you fluent in German and did you find it difficult to learn ?

I fell in love with a girl and followed her over. Old school stalking! I found German really, really easy to learn. I was totally saturated by the language for a few months, and learnt the bulk of it from watching TV. GZSZ; hells yeah! People through fluent around a little loosely re languages but I certainly am quite competent and have worked and done job interviews entirely in German. I feel my sense of humour loses itself a bit in German, but its probably just them. Surely.


Personally I love it over there, but why does everybody assume that because you speak English, that you must be from there ?

Haha! Thats just how zhey roll!

What part of China are you in, is there a drink/pub culture over there and what's the local brew like.?

Im near Shanghai. The Chinese have a weird relationship with booze. They treat it, in formal celebrations as a sort of show of bravado where everyone is aware of losing face. Like us I guess, just in a more organised cynical way. Loads of pubs here, girly bars are bleak places, with depressing entilted China weird people but there are normal bars/restaurants not a million miles removed from that of at home. I drink Tiger here as it is the cheapest.

Are you likely to invest in a flick-hatchet for when you are out playing poker.?

What the absolute fook is a flick-hatchet!? Without knowing, I would guess, categorically Yes!

Brave man for doing this, Best of luck .
Smurph says Hi!

Cheers Martin! And Hi to the significant better half!

[Closed_Account]

Your ideal line up of regs back in the fun times of the sporting

I loved that place. 9 handed. 1.I'd have Buchan in there (pony tailed Eamon) I never had as much fun playing V someone as him. 2. Murat. Gentleman and played fairly fast haha 3. Halfbaked and IanMc always good lols out of them (they count as one) 4. The Chief, good man for balooning a game, and would rile up IanMc and the other fellow 5. Kevin Maloney for his dry wit, 6. Lumberjack Paul, unassuming guy always good for decent staked props (retired afik) 7. Oberon, must have played my three biggest pots V him 8. SE in its pomp would not be SE without Mickste

Best and worst players you have played with

Best would probably be Dermot (not just because I owe him dough!) always looked a cut above. Troy was a pretty consistent winner in the games I played in, and I always liked how he played.

The worst is tough. When I played lots of people were v v bad. The system guy was horrific. Indian waiter guy who played always just gave it away. I dont know if Murat was bad but just a player I always held over.



Please tell a few tales of going on uber monkey tilt eg tipping dealers 25 for losing pots etc


God No! I was a bad loser when I was young, a really obnoxious fook! Player X to his credit, put an end to that when he quite rightly called me out infront of everyone and utterly humiliated me! Proper order and really changed how I behaved at the table.


The scariest situation you have found yourself in?


The first was my daughters birth. She was 14 days overdue. There were three midwifes jumping on my partners tummy and a big fuck off set of metal prongs clasped on the top of her head. When she came out she had a huge, huge, elongated cone head. I was terrified she was deformed, and how tough her life would be. Thankfully after a minute or so the nurses put me out of my misery explaining thats how babies be when they are literally pulled out of a body!


The second was getting beaten unconscious outside the Vatican by a group if scobies. I been in plenty of fights playing football but I remeber going to the ground thinking these guys are going to dance on my head. They did, but luckily a bouncer intervened before they could do any real damage.


Much love

Much love.

[PokerPiper]

I did get an A1 in honors English tbf, my essay was about a gambling addict to attends a GA meeting to win a bet.

When I am home I am going to inhale pints of Guiness for a few days.

Still LMAO here. Great well Sam. Fair Play.

I love your honesty & humour and wish you great things for the future.

What ever happened to Halfbaked ?

Do you get to see your daughter ?

Would you wing it back to Dublin for a reunion of all the old SE regs ?

Rugby or GAA ?

Biggest cash game Pot you have ever lost ?

[Guest]

Not sure what this means exactly. Something that did come into my head though is, whats the deal with the "Whose your Daddy?" comment in the sack, I dont get it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHA4-5N5AzA&feature=kp

[Jibzzzz]

Have never met you but always liked your posts and you seem like good people.

What level of under age and perhaps senior sport did you play? Types?

You win an all expenses week holiday with your family, where do you take them?

Same as above but with friends rather than family?

Have you ever been to the US? If so best tale?

You have been giving 100k but have to make an investment which you cant cash out for a year, what stock would you choose?

If Ireland make the 2018 World Cup, will you attend?

You seem close with posters on here, how many, if any, did you know before Poker?

What age are you?

Do you have twitter?

Cheers for this

[Closed_Account]

You've been on a bit of a health/fitness/self image improvement journey over the last while. What have you done and what more would you like to do?

Just common sense, easy to make changes. For the most part trying to eat good, clean food. I cut out Coke, and all sugar drinks which has hugely changed how I feel. I live on the 18th floor so I take the stairs, that kind of thing. Swimming. Swimming my absolute balls off.
I have no real targets, just keep doing what I have doing. The changes I have made are now my habits, so it is quite easy to stick to them at this stage. Basically, keep living in a way which means I have a bit of energy and feel good about myself.



You seem to have a real lack of self confidence and are generally a shy fellow from my dealings with you. Where did this stem from and is it something you'd like to change?

Oh God, is that how I come across! Tbf I have discovered my own value a little more this year and at the moment I feel quite confident. My problem is my mood can swing wildly, I CAN be confident, assured etc, and then something will change and I feel absolutely none of those things.
Before I went to China, I had close to zero confidence. My relationship had broken down and we were going through that nasty part of a break up, I had been treated, in retrospect I feel quite shadily by school who had made me a lot of promises and then not honored them, I had no money and was falling into debt. I was drinking far, far too much. Something in me had given up. It really had.
I think it has changed for the most part, but I think I always will be a shy enough guy.


What bores you and what excites you?

Eventually everything bores me to an extent.

Peeling back the seven of clubs and the nine of clubs in a raised pot, closing with action in the big blind excites me. Women excite me. New places excite me. Job interviews excite me. I love them. Competing in a good level of sport used to excite me greatly. There is nothing better than that nauseating feeling of being on the blocks at the start of a swimming gala, or kickoff against a team who are supposed to give you a beating.

Cheers V. Hope your well.

[Closed_Account]

Good stuff so far sam

Last time you spunked all the dough?

Before I came away I decided I would not go to China if I could run up 10k. I was pounding it pretty hard and got to 6k before I went down to the big pokerstars tourny at the end of last summer. Cant remember the buy in, maybe 2k or something. Anywho busted the tourny after 3 levels and debauched through the rest of the loot with a mate over the next few days. Went to China with 300 euro my Dad gave me.


Most degen thing youve seen in the Jackpot?

I love the Jackpot. Love the filth, the sheer chaos of a night in full flow. And if you timed it right, the games used to be great come 5 or 6 am. The Jackpot is THE degen. I cant think of a single incident that sticks out

Most ridiculous thing youve done when tilted? (mine would be throwing my laptop off a 3rd floor balcony and reversing over it in my car)

Haha Great minds. I smashed my laptop of the ground after losing an obscure pot in a .25 .50 game. I guess the tilted episode of tipping the dealer a pony every hand for an orbit was pretty retarded too


Any Dublin degens still owe you money?

Ha! You sure you know me!? I think Mick The Lip does, not much and I don't begrudge him it. Man earned it. All in the game. I owe a couple of people money who Ill fix up with when I'm back

do you enjoy poker if/when you play it anymore?

I love the IDEA of playing. The anticipation of a big tourny or a good sized cash game. After a few days, sometimes a few hours even I start to feel like I hate it. My temperature spikes, I hate being too hot and casinos are stuffy, sweltering places. Most of the time, before I left anyway I did not enjoy it really.

Will you set foot in a casino when you come back to dublin?

Yeah; I dont know re a casino but Im sure Ill play a few festivals.


You are much loved on here for your honesty and antics. Do you ever cringe at some of the stuff youve posted in the past and whether it could cause embarrasment in the future in the normie world? (obv youve not posted up anything as bad as hawkeyes story but how would you feel about your parents or normal friends reading through all your posts?)
Youve alluded to it in previous answers but would you say people have a pretty innacurate view of you based on your posting style, you tend to post up only the more degen aspects of your life, obv for the entertainment value. Does it ever annoy you that this is how you are viewed?

Id hate my mother to read it. My Dad would get a good lol from it. We are pretty complicit to be fair. Like when I was living at home I would frequently be sent down to the bookies to get my Dad for dinner, and wed end up rail heavening something and coming back to broken plates and no dinner.

I have two sets of friends. Normies and people involved in the gambling world. I always have been more attracted to the more degeny types within poker, people who are not so good at managing money etc, it makes for an interesting spin. My normy friends know I have degen leanings, Im not sure to what extent, but I would have no problem them reading anything I post.

No, be a bit precious to be annoyed by it, when it is clearly self inflicted. I dont think I regret anything I have posted in the past but who knows maybe it could come back to sodomize me.

Suck my hairy balls virtual footprint

Hope your well Shane.

[Closed_Account]

Is Bray basically like a poor town in China? Run down, bit of a dump and full of Asians?

Where I am living does have a lot of Asians tbf! All I would say about China is, it is nothing like you imagined it would be, everyone always says that and they are right.

Bray. How I loath thee.