Bad Beat/Moaning/Venting - pray for Lazare

[DeadParrot]

I dont know how the market is gone so crazy. If I got notice on my place now I would be pretty fucked I would say.

Not much of a chance getting a decent 2 bed apt with a parking space in a good area for €1200 anymore.

I was a bit annoyed we paid so much for our huge 3 bed apartment a few years back. Seems a bargain now

[ArmaniJeans]

They're all still earning fuck all doing crazy hours four or five years later too. Somebody needs to start bringing the pork chops pretty quickly if it's going to balance out for them over the long term.

They do seem to be a bit brainwashed tbf.

Honestly they do seem to be eternally waiting patiently hoping that if they keep flinging poo diligently then eventually Jesus will turn up with the pork chops. People sending text messages at half five to say they won't be able to make it to wherever at 8.45 on a Wednesday night, the same as last year and the year before, but next year it'll be different.

Whats this mean, is it a yoof expression or an internet meme, or some Kerry thing about the desirability of pork chops? Never heard it before anyway.

"Sketch, its the pork chops" used to be a phrase when a squad car would come into view back in the day when you were rolling a joint in The Outside Inn, but suspect it means something different here.

[RichieM]

They do seem to be a bit brainwashed tbf.

A constant case of "it will all be grand next year when I have my two years' experience in department A", when what they really want to work in is department B where if they're lucky they'll eventually be transferred and treated as a lacky for another two years.

Honestly they do seem to be eternally waiting patiently hoping that if they keep flinging poo diligently then eventually Jesus will turn up with the pork chops. People sending text messages at half five to say they won't be able to make it to wherever at 8.45 on a Wednesday night, the same as last year and the year before, but next year it'll be different.

One of my mates is particularly bad for this. We were out on Saturday night a few weeks back for a mates birthday. 9 O'Clock he goes outside, on the phone for 30 minutes, comes back in grabs his coat and off to the office.

[V for Vendetta]

They do seem to be a bit brainwashed tbf.

A constant case of "it will all be grand next year when I have my two years' experience in department A", when what they really want to work in is department B where if they're lucky they'll eventually be transferred and treated as a lacky for another two years.

Honestly they do seem to be eternally waiting patiently hoping that if they keep flinging poo diligently then eventually Jesus will turn up with the pork chops. People sending text messages at half five to say they won't be able to make it to wherever at 8.45 on a Wednesday night, the same as last year and the year before, but next year it'll be different.

There is a lot to be said for working in physical labouring jobs in your early formative years and negotiating your own pay. Life lessons which are invaluable. When you burst your balls picking stones out of a field or footing turf you soon lose the shyness about asking for what you are worth.

We raise kids these days to get gold stars and leaving cert points which leads to employees obsessed with doing a "good job" and getting a strong end of year review. God bless them though as they leave so much behind to be disbursed to the hungry.

[Guest]

Fair play LIDL

http://www.rte.ie/news/business/2015/1008/733219-lidl-living-wage/

Anyone else impressed that only 20% of LIDL's current employees earn less than €11.50 p/h currently?

They have come a long way baby

http://www.theguardian.com/business/2007/mar/14/businesscomment.supermarkets

They used to be so bad to work for, I have been told, that even now, Aldi for funzies, will interview ex lidl managers for jobs with no interest in hiring them

[Lord Sir Banter]

Inspiring reading.

So avoid:

Aldi
Lidl
The big four
Work

Anywhere decent?

[Denny Crane]

their graduate manager program thing starts people off on 61k or 68k too cant remember, plus car. Not so bad.

Insane work hours though, probably earning something close to 11.50 an hour.

[Denny Crane]

But you can't work 70 hours a week under EU law, or did I miss a memo?

Yeah strictly speaking no one works more than 40 hours in my place

[Guest]

But you can't work 70 hours a week under EU law, or did I miss a memo?

Retail/hospitality contracts have an opt out clause

Don't sign ,no job!

LIDL was my first job when I was 18/19, they were crazy understaffed, I guess their policy is better pay the few people they do hire well to make up for slavedriving. The people on the graduate programs genuinely worked 70+ hours weeks. Remember my manager at the time had permanently bloodshot eyes and generally looked fucking awful 90% of the time, yet he was always bragging about his new Merc and model gf, neither of which he got much time to use.

Long story short, had to move home fado fodo for family reasons having previously borrowed money to set myself up abroad

Family stuff takes a lot longer than originally thought, end up in a over €10K of debt
take Lidl manager job, starting about €35K

Worst of debt cleared in 6 months due to being too fucked to spend any money


If you're ever in the shits money wise, Lidl, Aldi manager jobs are a great way to get cash together but quit before you get used to it!

[Denny Crane]

They do seem to be a bit brainwashed tbf.

A constant case of "it will all be grand next year when I have my two years' experience in department A", when what they really want to work in is department B where if they're lucky they'll eventually be transferred and treated as a lacky for another two years.

Honestly they do seem to be eternally waiting patiently hoping that if they keep flinging poo diligently then eventually Jesus will turn up with the pork chops. People sending text messages at half five to say they won't be able to make it to wherever at 8.45 on a Wednesday night, the same as last year and the year before, but next year it'll be different.

I remember being at a seminar for Deloitte surrounded by a room full of absurdly excited people. I remember looking at slides of pictures of 4/5 young people working around tables, looking at the intake numbers, looking at the number of actual desirable higher positions down the line, what they were selling after you had done your time, and just thought you'd have to delusional to be sold that lie. It was like being sold a pyramid scheme.

[Guest]

To whom it may concern

I'm on the lash in Dublin this weekend, anyone fancies a pint I'm easily found

[Jibzzzz]

Today a girl in work handed in her notice and told me about her plans to travel the world.

With this news and from reading the BBV I think i will do the same.

Probably wont happen, shame.

[Emmet]

I remember being at a seminar for Deloitte surrounded by a room full of absurdly excited people. I remember looking at slides of pictures of 4/5 young people working around tables, looking at the intake numbers, looking at the number of actual desirable higher positions down the line, what they were selling after you had done your time, and just thought you'd have to delusional to be sold that lie. It was like being sold a pyramid scheme.

It is a pyramid scheme.

[Tar.Aldarion]

There is a lot to be said for working in physical labouring jobs in your early formative years and negotiating your own pay. Life lessons which are invaluable. When you burst your balls picking stones out of a field or footing turf you soon lose the shyness about asking for what you are worth.

We raise kids these days to get gold stars and leaving cert points which leads to employees obsessed with doing a "good job" and getting a strong end of year review. God bless them though as they leave so much behind to be disbursed to the hungry.

You lose that pretty fast working, I don't know how people don't.. When I went into my first meeting as a grad and they offered me 3% increase "as big raises aren't really done here" and I asked for more it was fecking hard to do but I wanted more so I looked them in the eye and did. It worked anyway and now I don't even have to ask. What do people think the worst that can happen is? What are they waiting for?

I saw a developer working 6 years on like 22k, somebody I know has been working as an architects assistant for 2 years in the UK, still on 15k! (got a £200 bonus lol). i would take it as a failing in an employee to not be pushing.

Such an irish thing, even grads strongly negotiate in the US etc and they get paid FAR more than us.

[Lord Sir Banter]

I remember being at a seminar for Deloitte surrounded by a room full of absurdly excited people. I remember looking at slides of pictures of 4/5 young people working around tables, looking at the intake numbers, looking at the number of actual desirable higher positions down the line, what they were selling after you had done your time, and just thought you'd have to delusional to be sold that lie. It was like being sold a pyramid scheme.

Speaking of pyramid schemes, now is the time to buy some golden nuggets at DugRig Inc. Deets to follow.

[Tar.Aldarion]

I remember being at a seminar for Deloitte surrounded by a room full of absurdly excited people. I remember looking at slides of pictures of 4/5 young people working around tables, looking at the intake numbers, looking at the number of actual desirable higher positions down the line, what they were selling after you had done your time, and just thought you'd have to delusional to be sold that lie. It was like being sold a pyramid scheme.

"Everybody will be guaranteed a manager position in 3 years!!!" - Accenture pitch to us

[AndyFatBastard]

Today a girl in work handed in her notice and told me about her plans to travel the world.

With this news and from reading the BBV I think i will do the same.

Probably wont happen, shame.

JFDI m8

[Guest]

JFDI m8

What do companies even get from flogging people for 70-80 hours a week? You cannot be productive even in the short /medium term working those hours. Work the odd 60 hour week myself but I'm getting paid overtime and I could tell them to shove it with no consequences,you would be zapped after it can't imagine doing it consistently

[Tar.Aldarion]

Meanwhile sweden moving to a 6 hour work day.

[Denny Crane]

It is a pyramid scheme.

You'd think when it was one high level guy selling it to a room full of people that more would realise!

[Hitchhiker's Guide To...]

...

[careca]

Just not sure a lot of those civil service jobs are actually that cushy. You do get to leave at 4pm on a Friday, but the work you do can be highly stressful as its always subject to complaints and politicians changing things. Plus there's the general frustration of working in an organisation that you know is inefficient.

Also; private sector should be trying to emulate public sector hours rather than encourage the public sector to join you in your misery.





Same pork chop question here.

presume its a skit on bringing home the bacon

[hotspur]

I work a maximum of 4 hours a day.

[Guest]

I work a maximum of 4 hours a day.

Are you in the pearl of Southeast asia yet?

[AndyFatBastard]

What do companies even get from flogging people for 70-80 hours a week? You cannot be productive even in the short /medium term working those hours. Work the odd 60 hour week myself but I'm getting paid overtime and I could tell them to shove it with no consequences,you would be zapped after it can't imagine doing it consistently

You'd be surprised. A lot of people aren't replaceable either due to ability levels, knowledge or lack of delegation. The last two things are a result of bad management, but the first, well... Some of the people I work with are super hardcore. Even after staying up all night to get something finished, operating at about ~40% effieciency they are about as useful as the rest of us.

I read a thing the other day that said 80% of the work gets done by 20% of the staff. Probably holds up in my experience.

[Denny Crane]

^ I read a stat that in the armies of the democratic nations in WWII 90% of the killing was done by 10% of the troops, the rest just provided cover. Wondered if work was the same.

[Guest]

80/20 applies to everything!

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pareto_principle

[Jibzzzz]

What would be considered the average working week? 37.5?

I do 45hrs - 9-6 Monday-Friday and find that normal.

Ideally I would enjoy 4 x 11.5hrs shifts Mon - Thurs for the 3 day weekend.

[hotspur]

Are you in the pearl of Southeast asia yet?

No, and for the second year in a row I have changed my plans to go. Just committed to something that means I can't take off.

[Raoul Duke III]

Everyone is replaceable.

[eamonhonda]

What would be considered the average working week? 37.5?

I do 45hrs - 9-6 Monday-Friday and find that normal.

Ideally I would enjoy 4 x 11.5hrs shifts Mon - Thurs for the 3 day weekend.

Or ideally youd be working no hours a week travelling the world

[Raoul Duke IV]

Everyone is replaceable.

Very true!

[Lord Sir Banter]

cheers mates, im quititng college

[RichieM]

What would be considered the average working week? 37.5?

I do 45hrs - 9-6 Monday-Friday and find that normal.

Ideally I would enjoy 4 x 11.5hrs shifts Mon - Thurs for the 3 day weekend.

When I was working in pubs I used to work doubles 3 days a week and take the other 4 days off.

[Tar.Aldarion]

Water gone from my apartment block today and yesterday, was supposed to be an "engineer" out last night, no sign. Rang today and "we havent been able to get in contact with the specialist", wtf kind of crap is that? Told them I'm ringing back in an hour, hope they have their homework done.

Can't wash, cook clean, it turned into the walking dead pretty fast.

[Jibzzzz]

Overheard some Germans on my lunch break giving out about Ze inefficiency of the Dublin bus service. Classic.

[Strewelpeter]

Everyone is replaceable.

Thats just not true.
I've seen businesses fail because they lost just one person and often its not who you would imagine to be the key players.

[RichieM]

Thats just not true.
I've seen businesses fail because they lost just one person and often its not who you would imagine to be the key players.

That is a failure to replace them or replacing them with the wrong person more than likely I would say.

You are right in terms of crucial people not always being who you expect. Was it on here that someone was talking about a guy in Intel? who was super confident of keeping his job when downsizing because he was one of 3 people who knew how to turn on the machines.

[Ed]

What would be considered the average working week? 37.5?

I do 45hrs - 9-6 Monday-Friday and find that normal.

Ideally I would enjoy 4 x 11.5hrs shifts Mon - Thurs for the 3 day weekend.

When most companies talk about a 40 hour working week they don't include the lunch break, so presuming you get an hour on your 9-6 shift, you're only working 8 hrs a day and would be considered a 40hr week.

[Guest]

That is a failure to replace them or replacing them with the wrong person more than likely I would say.

You are right in terms of crucial people not always being who you expect. Was it on here that someone was talking about a guy in Intel? who was super confident of keeping his job when downsizing because he was one of 3 people who knew how to turn on the machines.

That's total nonsense. For a start there are hundreds of production tools supplied by dozens of vendors that have 24/7 on site field engineers. Beyond that each engineer in Intel is assigned to one machine, and generally if anything beyond interacting with software is required they call on the vendor's engineers.

[Guest]

That's total nonsense. For a start there are hundreds of production tools supplied by dozens of vendors that have 24/7 on site field engineers. Beyond that each engineer in Intel is assigned to one machine, and generally if anything beyond interacting with software is required they call on the vendor's engineers.

It was me, and it was just a line by him to show how fucked the place was and how safe he was

I repeat it as it was said to me, as it's funny and the point stands

[Guest]

It doesn't really stand. The model of Intel follow is called 'copy exactly'. In Ireland fab creativity is discouraged and everyone here is eminently replaceable

[Strewelpeter]

That is a failure to replace them or replacing them with the wrong person more than likely I would say. .

No its about talent, you'd see it most in immature tech where there is an engineer with vision but I've also seen it happen where one genius salesman was making all the hard sales and everyone else was taking orders that were only coming in as trickledown from the business good guy was bringing in.

[Keane]

Whats this mean, is it a yoof expression or an internet meme, or some Kerry thing about the desirability of pork chops? Never heard it before anyway.

"Sketch, its the pork chops" used to be a phrase when a squad car would come into view back in the day when you were rolling a joint in The Outside Inn, but suspect it means something different here.

[Keane]

I remember being at a seminar for Deloitte surrounded by a room full of absurdly excited people. I remember looking at slides of pictures of 4/5 young people working around tables, looking at the intake numbers, looking at the number of actual desirable higher positions down the line, what they were selling after you had done your time, and just thought you'd have to delusional to be sold that lie. It was like being sold a pyramid scheme.

You've absolutely nailed it.

That's total nonsense. For a start there are hundreds of production tools supplied by dozens of vendors that have 24/7 on site field engineers. Beyond that each engineer in Intel is assigned to one machine, and generally if anything beyond interacting with software is required they call on the vendor's engineers.

My cousin works for Kerry Group and says the above is genuinely true of a couple of lads that work in whatever factory they make cheese strings, where nobody else has any idea how to work the machines.

On a related topic, apparently never eat cheese strings. Go figure.

What do companies even get from flogging people for 70-80 hours a week? You cannot be productive even in the short /medium term working those hours. Work the odd 60 hour week myself but I'm getting paid overtime and I could tell them to shove it with no consequences,you would be zapped after it can't imagine doing it consistently

Genuinely I suspect an awful lot of it is schadenfreude. Imagine the sort of creeps that manage to crawl over the mangled wreckage of their peers to land the holy grail middle management position in these places.

Even if this guy was smart enough to recognise the flaws of the system he just went through there's not a hope in life he's presiding over a change that would allow the next crowd to avoid it.

[RichieM]

No its about talent, you'd see it most in immature tech where there is an engineer with vision but I've also seen it happen where one genius salesman was making all the hard sales and everyone else was taking orders that were only coming in as trickledown from the business good guy was bringing in.

Yes and they didn't replace them. He was not the only engineer with Vision in the world and that guy is not the only good salesman.

Either through not being able to find the right people or not prepared to pay the money required to secure them they didn't.

The people were replaceable the skills set\resources required to do so was not present.

[Guest]

It doesn't really stand. The model of Intel follow is called 'copy exactly'. In Ireland fab creativity is discouraged and everyone here is eminently replaceable

SO you're saying everything isn't a hand crafted one off piece of art?

[hotspur]

I suspect the replaceable / not replaceable argument is insufficiently specified.

[Guest]

That German hipster fuck still unemployed?

lol, no way he goes to Liverpool. He can sit til the summer and take over Bayern or Germany.

Ya but the hipster in him might go for it

So, ive just burned all my socks and I'm off up to Shoreditch to get me barbwire swallow tattoo on me wrist and some top quality pomade for my new mustache what I will be growing

[Flushdraw]

94-97 going into this Countdown Conundrum

Fastest i've ever seen!

[VINE]e0KmXhOHwEQ[/VINE]

[Strewelpeter]

94-97 going into this Countdown Conundrum

Fastest i've ever seen!

[VINE]e0KmXhOHwEQ[/VINE]

Its a fairly easy one as they go.. I spotted it on the second spin and you can't really see all the letters!

If I'm going to spot it at all it the vast majority will be in less than ten seconds.


Vintage Countdown with Richard and Carol on challenge is the best thing on TV these days

[Raoul Duke III]

Some krowd of krauts in town.

Looking suspiciously konfident.

[AndyFatBastard]

94-97 going into this Countdown Conundrum

Fastest i've ever seen!

[VINE]e0KmXhOHwEQ[/VINE]

He's clearly hit the button and then done the conundrum. Decent gambit IMO.

[Strewelpeter]

WTF was wrong with me that I didn't go on Countdown when Me Richard and Carol were all in our prime

Also would love to have done 15 to 1 when WGS was doing it

I used to be shit hot at GK but have completely gone to seed since Google came along and replaced the need to remember anything at all

[CHDad]

So, ive just burned all my socks and I'm off up to Shoreditch to get me barbwire swallow tattoo on me wrist and some top quality pomade for my new mustache what I will be growing

Madness.

Germany and Bayern will probably need a new manager in the summer. I question Klopps sanity. Liverpool can pretend to be an elite club but it just simply isn't true. Why is he going there? Money.

[Strewelpeter]

He's clearly hit the button and then done the conundrum. Decent gambit IMO.

Not really a gambit, that the thing with those you often know you have recognised it before the word comes... Its like you match the pattern, press the button and then you have loads of time for your brain to work out what the word you saw is.

[Keane]

Is there any sort of strategy for doing those conundrums or is it just practise?

I'm reasonable at the normal game but I could be looking at that conundrum all day and never get anywhere.

[Guest]

WTF was wrong with me that I didn't go on Countdown when Me Richard and Carol were all in our prime

Also would love to have done 15 to 1 when WGS was doing it

My brother was on it (not the mouthy one). Made the mistake of taking a light grey shirt into a hot studio. Comical watching him with his arms glued to his side for the duration. Came 5th afair.

[Strewelpeter]

Way back I used to set the timer to record Countdown on VCR and then listen to it as audio only in bed at night.
My Brother thought this was an hilariously ridiculous thing to do and typical of how insane I am, so he love to tell people about me doing this and then add the punchline 'and he always gets the conundrum'

[DeadParrot]

"Everybody will be guaranteed a manager position in 3 years!!!" - Accenture pitch to us

Sounds like something from Boiler Room

SPOILER

Okay. Here’s the deal.
I’m not here to waste your time. I hope you’re not here to waste mine.
So I’m gonna keep this short.

If you become an employee of this firm, you will make your first million within three years.
Okay? I repeat that:

You will make a million dollars within three years of your first day of employment
at J.T. Marlin.

There is no question whether or not you’ll become a millionaire here.
The only question is how many times over.
You think I’m joking?
I am not joking.
I am a millionaire. It’s a weird thing to hear, right?
I’ll tell ya. It’s a weird thing to say.
I am a fucking millionaire.
And guess how old I am. Twenty-seven.
You know what that makes me here?
A fuckin’ senior citizen.
This firm is entirely comprised of people your age, not mine.
Lucky for me, I’m very fucking good at my job, or I’d be out of one.
You guys are the new blood. You’re gonna go home with the kessef.
You are the future big swinging dicks of this firm.

Now, you all look money hungry, and that’s good.
Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn’t fuckin’ have any.
They say money can’t buy happiness? Look at the fuckin’ smile on my face.
Ear to ear, baby. You want details? Fine.

I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet.
What’s up? I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork.
I have every toy you could imagine, and best of all, kids…
I am liquid.

So, now you know what’s possible. Let me tell you what’s required.
You are required to work your fucking ass off at this firm.
We want winners here, not pikers. A piker walks at the bell.
A piker asks how much vacation you get in the first year. Vacation?
People come and work at this firm for one reason: to become filthy rich.
We’re not here to make friends. We’re not savin’ the manatees, guys.
You want vacation time?
Go teach third grade, public school.

Okay. The first three months at the firm are as a trainee.
You make $150 a week.
After you’re done training, you take the Series Seven.
Pass that, you become junior broker and you open accounts for your team leader.
You open 40 accounts, you start workin’ for yourself. Sky’s the limit.
Word about being a trainee.

Friends, parents, other brokers, they’re gonna give you shit.
It’s true. $150 a week? Not a lot of money.
Pay them no mind.
You need to learn this business, and this is the time to do it.
Once you pass the test, none of that’s gonna matter.
Your friends are shit.
Tell them you made 25 grand last month, they won’t fucking believe you.
Fuck them! Fuck ‘em!
Parents don’t like the life you lead?
“Fuck you, Mom and Dad.”
See how it feels when you’re makin’ their fuckin’ Lexus payments.
Now, go home and think about it.
Think about whether it’s really for you.
If you decide it isn’t… It’s nothing to be embarrassed about.
It’s not for everyone.

Thanks.

But if you really want this…
you call me on Monday and we’ll talk.
Just don’t waste my fuckin’ time.

Okay. That’s it.