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    #61
    The table talk

    So, as we should all know, I need you guys to post your daily picks as a TABLE.

    Here's how:

    Step 1: identify the winners of every race you're going to bet in (this is the easy bit).
    Laugh to yourself thinking of the loots you will win and imagine the various goods and services you will purchase with your stack of freshly-minted fiddies.
    Make sure when making these awesome selections that you adhere to Rules 3
    (yes there are two Rule 3s, no I don't know why, now fuck off and refer to Rule 6)

    Let's say we're going to back:

    Race 1 - Dog Food Delight 100 Win
    Race 2 - Never Started - 50 Each Way
    Race 5 - Three Legged Tortoise - 50 Win
    Race 5 - Donkey Derby - 50 Win
    Race 7 - Reverse Gear - 25 Each Way

    Step 2: open your favourite Spreadsheet application and create a list with 4 columns like the below:



    Column A = Race number. Enter in the format 'R1', R2' etc
    Column B = Horse Name. Spell it right, as per the official racecard you dyslexic scum.
    Column C = stake
    Column D = type of bet. Either W (win) or EW (each way). These are the only two allowable values in this data domain.

    Save this spreadsheet so you can re-use it on subsequent days on your inevitable charge to glory.

    Step 3: post your selection as a table in this thread:

    simply copy your selections from Excel and paste into this thread. Then wrap [TABLE] tags around it like so.



    Step 4: Submit your post and admire your handiwork as below



    Step 5: ????Profit

    If you fuck up this extremely simple task, I reserve the right to be a prick. See Rule 6.



    "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

    Comment


      #62
      We now have 32 declarations eagerly awaiting the (compete lack of) the traditional Cheltenham roar tomorrow.

      €1,600 in the pot. Runners below:
      balfejohn
      Charlie Sheen
      Dead Parrot
      Degag
      Dice75
      Dice47
      eagle eye
      elbows
      Eoghan104
      Gimmeabreak
      GMoran1
      goldcupfav
      Hitch
      ionapaul
      Jibzzzz
      Lao Lao
      Lplate
      luckforsome
      mcnugget
      Murdrum
      nicnicnic
      oleras
      Pat Mustard
      pokerhand
      Raoul Duke III
      shano1888
      shrapnel
      Silver Tiger
      Solksjaer
      Strewelpeter
      The Aul Switcheroo
      The Situation

      "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

      Comment


        #63
        In, money shipped!

        Comment


          #64
          Originally posted by rounders123 View Post
          In, money shipped!
          Be on your best behaviour now, I don't think my heart could take another Royal Ascot 1.01 gubbing.
          "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

          Comment


            #65
            Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post

            Be on your best behaviour now, I don't think my heart could take another Royal Ascot 1.01 gubbing.
            That experience will stand to you. If it hasn't bottomed you. Time is a good healer that's the good thing.

            Comment


              #66
              Originally posted by rounders123 View Post

              That experience will stand to you. If it hasn't bottomed you. Time is a good healer that's the good thing.
              I just don't think I'm jumping with the same zest since that race.

              Maybe a return to the Cotswolds will help, who knows. It's an art, not a science!
              "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

              Comment


                #67
                Anyway, shouldn't you be typing out your preview notes?
                "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                Comment


                  #68
                  Count me in for my annual donation to the cause, nearly forgot about this. Money shipped.

                  Comment


                    #69
                    Just an FYI for everyone...copying and pasting from excel or sheets does NOT need tags posted, using tags will render your selection invisible.

                    e.g No tags
                    R1 This Nag 100 W
                    R2 That Nag 50 EW
                    R4 Gordons Chair 100 W
                    R5 Dice's Rabbit Foot 100 W
                    People say I should be more humble I hope they understand, they don't listen when you mumble
                    Get a shiny metal Revolut card! And a free tenner!
                    https://revolut.com/referral/jamesb8!G10D21

                    Comment


                      #70
                      Approaching safety limits here and the riders will all be jockeying for a good position coming to the first with 34 declared runners racing for a prize fund of €1,700
                      balfejohn
                      Charlie Sheen
                      Dead Parrot
                      Degag
                      Dice75
                      Dice47
                      eagle eye
                      elbows
                      Eoghan104
                      Gimmeabreak
                      GMoran1
                      goldcupfav
                      Hitch
                      ionapaul
                      Jibzzzz
                      Lao Lao
                      Lplate
                      luckforsome
                      mcnugget
                      Murdrum
                      nicnicnic
                      NoRiverRequired
                      oleras
                      Pat Mustard
                      pokerhand
                      Raoul Duke III
                      rounders123
                      shano1888
                      shrapnel
                      Silver Tiger
                      Solksjaer
                      Strewelpeter
                      The Aul Switcheroo
                      The Situation
                      "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                      Comment


                        #71
                        Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post
                        Strange not to see rounders, Strewel and NoRiverRequired not among the declarations....
                        mission complete
                        "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                        Comment


                          #72
                          shambles still missing though

                          Comment


                            #73
                            Originally posted by DeadParrot View Post
                            Just an FYI for everyone...copying and pasting from excel or sheets does NOT need tags posted, using tags will render your selection invisible.

                            e.g No tags
                            R1 This Nag 100 W
                            R2 That Nag 50 EW
                            R4 Gordons Chair 100 W
                            R5 Dice's Rabbit Foot 100 W
                            listen to this man
                            "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                            Comment


                              #74
                              and SPELL the fucking horses names right FFS

                              not looking at anyone in particular here, except maybe Solksjaer
                              "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                              Comment


                                #75
                                I will perform my customary function at this juncture and state that the following are due

                                SPOILER
                                .....luckforsome....


                                SPOILER
                                elbows


                                SPOILER
                                Strewelpeter
                                "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                Comment


                                  #76
                                  R1 adfadf 100 W
                                  R2 sdasdv 100 W
                                  Last edited by Dice75; 15-03-21, 11:42.

                                  Comment


                                    #77
                                    Originally posted by Dice75 View Post
                                    [

                                    Testing - that work ok RD?
                                    yes, although per DP, you should just paste directly from excel
                                    "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                    Comment


                                      #78
                                      Kapgarry to win the 2.03 at Stratford and provide us some ammo pls
                                      "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                      Comment


                                        #79
                                        Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post
                                        Kapgarry to win the 2.03 at Stratford and provide us some ammo pls
                                        Universal Dave 14:55 Punch mine to start the week in a hole.

                                        Dunno how anyone uses this site on the regular anymore btw, like cracking the enigma code to get in.
                                        Last edited by The Situation; 15-03-21, 12:40.
                                        Profit before people.

                                        Comment


                                          #80
                                          Runners and riders form

                                          balfejohn Mystery surrounds this fellow from a gambling yard. Davy Russel doesn't even know where he's trained.
                                          Charlie Sheen Travells well in the main and if improving his jumping he should have a say although he would ideally like it softer.
                                          Dead Parrot Gazumped on more than one occasion recently but chances if he can keep brush up on his jumping
                                          Degag Twice raced on flat before switching to hurdles where he showed some ability. Comes here as a novice and has it to prove. Price reflects his chance.
                                          Dice75 Last years winner finishing with a wet sail. Form since has been patchy and by and large stuck in the barn ever since
                                          Dice47 Da Unknown quantity who never raced in a bumper, hurdle or chase but won a point in Ballinaboula in '87.
                                          eagle eye Completely changed character since moving stable and chance if settling better early
                                          elbows Nearly landed a valuable pot at Limerick.
                                          Eoghan104 Covid super spreader owning to unapologetically being at Cheltenham last year. Prefers Aintree but proven winner at the highest table.
                                          Gimmeabreak Owners sending him to Cheltenham as their banker for the Xmas loots. Will be sold on to the highest bidder after this race by cold hearted connections so every incentive to run well.
                                          GMoran1 Better than the result when fifth on seasonal debut at Christmas. Doesn't take much racing and selectively campaigned
                                          goldcupfav Won first 3 starts over fences, the second a Naas Grade 1, but firmly put in his place last time on a seemingly easier assignment.
                                          Hitch Owners like a day out but have garnered knowledge with recent outings and improvement likely.
                                          ionapaul Slow boat but results more consistent than most. Guaranteed to stay, jumps well and acts on any ground.
                                          Jibzzzz Good early season form, mostly let down by jumping since, failing to complete last 2 starts. Others preferred.
                                          Lao Lao Owned, trained and ridden by the wife. With restaurants closed recent results suggest he could show up prominent.
                                          Lplate Been around the block will be the first Glenbeigh flapper race winner to ever run in the gold ribband. 3 wins at Dromahane followed by ready progression. Quite a reach this but can't rule out of calculations.
                                          luckforsome From lovelorn fast eating champion to gold ribband winner would be quite a story but shoots for the stars and who would deny his place in the field.
                                          mcnugget Has developed into a very smart chaser, tough and reliable and should be on the premises again.
                                          Murdrum Chasing type who has relished the switch to fences this winter, winning brace of 3m handicaps, but he's not up to this level.
                                          nicnicnic Former winner thrives on his racing. He takes a licking but keeps on ticking.
                                          oleras Beset with ailments but we've seen numerous occasions he cooks up a storm late in the day
                                          Pat Mustard taken very well to fences this season. Delivered on promise until a bad fall off a milk float.
                                          pokerhand Made up into a useful novice hurdler last season, remains with potential.
                                          Raoul Duke III Set to prove to connections last years prominent showing was no fluke. Has changed yards since and won't have to improve much to get competitive. Market moves could be telling.
                                          shano1888 After a couple of dismal runs finally got his act together at Sandown but flopped latest run at Wincanton
                                          shrapnel Gallic raider whose winning form at Cagnes-Sur-Mer and Compilegne is hard to quantify. Known fetlock issues and missed engagements don't bode well but connections remain bullish.
                                          Silver Tiger He's well worth another chance on balance.Tough and reliable so should be on the premises again.
                                          Solksjaer Used to be quite an athlete in his novice days according to himself. Recent form can't back that claim up. But has a stubborn resilient streak and chances if everything clicks into place on the day.
                                          The Aul Switcheroo He's well worth another chance on balance. Hasn't been dealt a good hand since the Fitz chase and something to prove now.
                                          The Situation It's 6 years on from his first win here and 3 years since his 2nd win here so it trends are true should win this year. But it's a long time between drinks now but hall of fame awaits if he can roll back the years.
                                          Rounders123 Versatile performer who has already won at Cheltenham followed by Royal Ascot. Outrunning his purchase price.

                                          Comment


                                            #81
                                            Awesome Rounders. great write up!

                                            Comment


                                              #82
                                              Originally posted by The Situation View Post

                                              Universal Dave 14:55 Punch mine to start the week in a hole.

                                              Dunno how anyone uses this site on the regular anymore btw, like cracking the enigma code to get in.
                                              Mine ran like a dog with three legs
                                              "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                              Comment


                                                #83
                                                R1 Metier 100 W
                                                R2 Captain Guinness 50 EW
                                                R3 Cepage 50 EW
                                                R4 Silver Streak 50 EW
                                                R6 Sage Advice 50 EW
                                                This OK RD ?

                                                Had issues using open office, wouldn't let me paste in here, had to paste to google sheets first and then c+p to here. Its google sheets so from now on, in case anyone else is having issues.
                                                This too shall pass.

                                                Comment


                                                  #84
                                                  Originally posted by oleras View Post
                                                  R1 Metier 100 W
                                                  R2 Captain Guinness 50 EW
                                                  R3 Cepage 50 EW
                                                  R4 Silver Streak 50 EW
                                                  R6 Sage Advice 50 EW
                                                  This OK RD ?

                                                  Had issues using open office, wouldn't let me paste in here, had to paste to google sheets first and then c+p to here. Its google sheets so from now on, in case anyone else is having issues.
                                                  works fine
                                                  "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                  Comment


                                                    #85
                                                    ...Day 1 selections...
                                                    R1 Appreciate It 100 W
                                                    R3 Happygolucky 100 W
                                                    R4 Epatante 100 W
                                                    R5 Indefatigable 50 EW
                                                    R6 Houx Gris 100 W
                                                    R7 Galvin 100 W
                                                    ...Current balance 1000- Expected balance by end of day, 2150...
                                                    Last edited by luckforsome; 15-03-21, 22:49. Reason: ...Adding in the super mare for extra loots and increasing the expected balance...

                                                    Comment


                                                      #86
                                                      R1 Blue Lord 100 W
                                                      R3 Alnadum 100 W
                                                      R4 Sharjah 100 W
                                                      R6 Youmdor 100 W
                                                      R7 Remastered 100 W
                                                      Last edited by The Situation; 16-03-21, 10:56.
                                                      Profit before people.

                                                      Comment


                                                        #87
                                                        R1 Ballyadam 50 W
                                                        R3 Happygolucky 100 W
                                                        R4 Honeysuckle 100 W
                                                        R5 Roksana 100 W
                                                        R6 Busselton 100 W

                                                        Comment


                                                          #88
                                                          I think i can
                                                          Do tables so count
                                                          Me in debutant please
                                                          Send deets

                                                          Comment


                                                            #89
                                                            LOL, WP limpwhacker (ye bollix). Sent.
                                                            "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                            Comment


                                                              #90
                                                              Now 35 runners in the field and racing for €1,750
                                                              In racecard order:
                                                              balfejohn
                                                              Charlie Sheen
                                                              Dead Parrot
                                                              Degag
                                                              Dice75
                                                              Dice47
                                                              eagle eye
                                                              elbows
                                                              Eoghan104
                                                              Gimmeabreak
                                                              GMoran1
                                                              goldcupfav
                                                              Hitch
                                                              ionapaul
                                                              Jibzzzz
                                                              Lao Lao
                                                              limpwhacker
                                                              Lplate
                                                              luckforsome
                                                              mcnugget
                                                              Murdrum
                                                              nicnicnic
                                                              NoRiverRequired
                                                              oleras
                                                              Pat Mustard
                                                              pokerhand
                                                              Raoul Duke III
                                                              rounders123
                                                              shano1888
                                                              shrapnel
                                                              Silver Tiger
                                                              Solksjaer
                                                              Strewelpeter
                                                              The Aul Switcheroo
                                                              The Situation
                                                              "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                              Comment


                                                                #91
                                                                Disturbing lack of sidebets so far this year.
                                                                "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                Comment


                                                                  #92
                                                                  Race Horse Stake Bet
                                                                  R3 Pym 100 W
                                                                  R4 Aspire Tower 100 W
                                                                  R4 Minella Melody 100 W
                                                                  R6 Her Indoors 100 W
                                                                  R7 Lord Royal 100 W
                                                                  Last edited by Raoul Duke III; 16-03-21, 10:39.
                                                                  "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                  Comment


                                                                    #93
                                                                    Race1 Ballyadam 50 Win
                                                                    Race2 Allmankind 50 Win
                                                                    Race3 Alnadam 25 EW
                                                                    Race4 Epatante 100 W
                                                                    Race5 Concertista 100 W
                                                                    Loots sent AIB to AIB so should be insta. Nice table full of winnersnot

                                                                    Comment


                                                                      #94
                                                                      This is the best time, just when everyone thinks they're going to win and no facts have emerged to contradict them.
                                                                      "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                      Comment


                                                                        #95
                                                                        R3 Vintage Clouds 100 W
                                                                        R6 Jeff Kidder 100 W
                                                                        R7 Galvin 100 W
                                                                        His rival it seems, had broken his dreams,By stealing the girl of his fancy.Her name was Magill, and she called herself Lil,But everyone knew her as Nancy.

                                                                        Comment


                                                                          #96
                                                                          Race Horse Stake Bet
                                                                          R3 One For The Team 100 W
                                                                          R4 Goshen 100 W
                                                                          R5 Indefatigable 50 EW
                                                                          R6 Coltor 100 W
                                                                          Last edited by rounders123; 16-03-21, 09:48.

                                                                          Comment


                                                                            #97
                                                                            R1 Metier 100 W
                                                                            R3 Aye Right 100 W
                                                                            R4 Honeysuckle 100 W
                                                                            R6 Curious Bride 100 W
                                                                            R7 Escaria Ten 100 W

                                                                            Comment


                                                                              #98
                                                                              R1 Appreciate It 100 W
                                                                              R3 Milan Native 50 W
                                                                              R4 Honeysuckle 100 W
                                                                              R5 Concertista 100 W
                                                                              R6 Coltor 50 W
                                                                              R7 Galvin 100 W
                                                                              Jayzus, Sheila! I forgot me feckin' trousers

                                                                              Comment


                                                                                #99
                                                                                race horse stake bet type
                                                                                r4 abacadabras 30 ew
                                                                                r5 indefatigable 20 ew
                                                                                r6 sage advice 20 ew
                                                                                r6 homme public 30 ew
                                                                                r7 nestor park 20 ew
                                                                                r7 snow leopardess 40 w

                                                                                Comment


                                                                                  R1 Metier 100 W
                                                                                  R2 ALLMANKIND 100 W
                                                                                  R3 ALNADAM 100 W
                                                                                  R4 ABACADABRAS 100 W
                                                                                  R5 BLACK TEARS 100 W
                                                                                  Last edited by Solksjaer!; 15-03-21, 23:45.

                                                                                  Comment


                                                                                    R1 Ballyadam 100 W
                                                                                    R3 Alnadam 100 W
                                                                                    R4 Silver Streak 50 EW
                                                                                    R5 Black Tears 50 EW
                                                                                    R7 Escaria Ten 100 W

                                                                                    Comment


                                                                                      Originally posted by Solksjaer! View Post
                                                                                      R1 Metler W 100
                                                                                      R2 ALL HUMAN KIND W 100
                                                                                      R3 ALNADHAM W 100
                                                                                      R4 ABACADABRAS W 100
                                                                                      R5 BLACK TEARS W 100
                                                                                      dude
                                                                                      "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                                      Comment


                                                                                        R1 Soaring Glory 100 W
                                                                                        R3 Milan Native 100 W
                                                                                        R6 Homme Public 50 EW
                                                                                        R7 Ofalltheginjoints 50 EW

                                                                                        Comment


                                                                                          R1 appreciate it 100 w
                                                                                          R3 happy-go-lucky 100 w
                                                                                          R4 honeysuckle 100 w
                                                                                          R5 concertista 100 w
                                                                                          R7 next destination 100 w
                                                                                          No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity, but I know none, therefore am no beast.

                                                                                          Comment


                                                                                            ...Pokerhands selections invalid as they have fallen off the screen... What is the cut off for edits, 12:59?...

                                                                                            Comment


                                                                                              Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post

                                                                                              dude
                                                                                              I've been very cursory to this thread. What did I do ? Spellingzzz? Format ? Non runners ? Wha wha wha ?

                                                                                              ah now tis fixed .
                                                                                              Last edited by Solksjaer!; 15-03-21, 23:14.

                                                                                              Comment


                                                                                                Originally posted by Solksjaer! View Post

                                                                                                I've been very cursory to this thread. What did I do ? Spellingzzz? Format ? Non runners ? Wha wha wha ?

                                                                                                ah now tis fixed .
                                                                                                Spelling obv.
                                                                                                No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity, but I know none, therefore am no beast.

                                                                                                Comment


                                                                                                  R3 Milan Native 100 W
                                                                                                  R6 Zoffanien 50 EW
                                                                                                  R7 Remastered 100 W

                                                                                                  Comment


                                                                                                    Originally posted by pokerhand View Post

                                                                                                    Spelling obv.
                                                                                                    Do horsie names need to be spelling Bs ? Me readers are on the fridge . I'm too lazy

                                                                                                    Comment


                                                                                                      R1 Blue Lord 100 W
                                                                                                      R4 Epatante 50 W
                                                                                                      R6 Youmdor 50 EW

                                                                                                      Comment


                                                                                                        Originally posted by Solksjaer! View Post

                                                                                                        Do horsie names need to be spelling Bs ? Me readers are on the fridge . I'm too lazy
                                                                                                        It works on lookups, which requires you to post the correct name....I haven't found a way to make the algorithim idiot-proof yet.
                                                                                                        "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                                                        Comment


                                                                                                          Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post

                                                                                                          It works on lookups, which requires you to post the correct name....I haven't found a way to make the algorithim idiot-proof yet.
                                                                                                          Ah here ref . It's been corrected , I walked all the way to the fridge for me glasses . (Needed for music King)

                                                                                                          Comment


                                                                                                            R3 Discordantly 100 W
                                                                                                            R4 Silver Streak 100 W
                                                                                                            R5 Great White Shark 100 W
                                                                                                            R6 Curious Bride 100 W
                                                                                                            Thanks Oleras

                                                                                                            Comment


                                                                                                              Originally posted by luckforsome View Post
                                                                                                              ...Pokerhands selections invalid as they have fallen off the screen... What is the cut off for edits, 12:59?...
                                                                                                              never seen that before, how is it even possible?
                                                                                                              "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                                                              Comment


                                                                                                                Just three non-runners to watch out for so far:
                                                                                                                • Numitor in R2
                                                                                                                • Tinnahalla in R6
                                                                                                                • Soldier of Love in R7

                                                                                                                The going is soft, allegedly.
                                                                                                                "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                                                                Comment


                                                                                                                  Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post

                                                                                                                  never seen that before, how is it even possible?
                                                                                                                  Are you able to use? Can't seem to edit
                                                                                                                  No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity, but I know none, therefore am no beast.

                                                                                                                  Comment


                                                                                                                    R3 Cepage 50 W
                                                                                                                    R3 The Wolf 50 W
                                                                                                                    R6 Homme Public 50 W
                                                                                                                    R6 Zoffanien 50 W
                                                                                                                    R7 Escaria Ten 100 W


                                                                                                                    Comment


                                                                                                                      R1 Appreciate It 100 W
                                                                                                                      R3 Milan Native 100 W
                                                                                                                      R6 Busselton 50 EW
                                                                                                                      R7 OfAllTheGinJoints 50 EW
                                                                                                                      People say I should be more humble I hope they understand, they don't listen when you mumble
                                                                                                                      Get a shiny metal Revolut card! And a free tenner!
                                                                                                                      https://revolut.com/referral/jamesb8!G10D21

                                                                                                                      Comment


                                                                                                                        Originally posted by pokerhand View Post

                                                                                                                        Are you able to use? Can't seem to edit
                                                                                                                        yes, copies OK to excel
                                                                                                                        "We are not Europeans. Those people on the continent are freaks."

                                                                                                                        Comment


                                                                                                                          Originally posted by Raoul Duke III View Post

                                                                                                                          never seen that before, how is it even possible?
                                                                                                                          extra wide cells in the excel
                                                                                                                          People say I should be more humble I hope they understand, they don't listen when you mumble
                                                                                                                          Get a shiny metal Revolut card! And a free tenner!
                                                                                                                          https://revolut.com/referral/jamesb8!G10D21

                                                                                                                          Comment

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